Confrontation on the street
Reuben recounts the moment everything changed
Ryan SheltonHostHugh van CuylenburgHostJosh van CuylenburgHostI schtipped you, too.
Uh, [laughs] I think.
I don't think I used that right.
Okay.
[laughs] Um, I, I wanna bring something up that I've been toying with for the whole episode, um, and, but I think it's important, really important.
Um, when I was a lot younger, when I was about 19, I reckon, I'm, I'm just trying to work out the time, someone I know, a similar thing happened to that happened to you.
Um, different circumstances, very different in many ways, but not a dissimilar outcome.
Um, and I am, I think I'm guilty of not doing the right thing then, and I think as a friendship group, we kind of, we didn't see that damage could be caused permanently, and that, that this could have been traumatic to this person.
And we temporarily, not at their expense, but there was joking about it and laughing, I think out of the awkwardness of not knowing how to respond to what had happened to them.
I don't think the event was ever taken as seriously as it should have been.
Um, and I've been feeling more guilty as this episode's gone on for not doing more for that person back then.
And I bring this up not to try and make this about me, but I bring it up to say, what did you learn through this process that a group of mates, 19, 20-year-old guys, or any age, if this happens to a friend of theirs, what... how could they respond better? 'Cause I think we really failed that person.
Thank, thank you for sharing that, um, because an assault w- of any kind is horrific for everybody involved, not just the person involved.
Um, um, but it is absolutely not anybody's fault other than the, the, the perpetrator's.
And, um, one of my, one of my best mates, um, who's an incredible man, Sean Larkin, he was, uh, the last person at the, um, at the apartment that night, and he, he left me on the couch at f- at 5:00 AM, and he thought, "Surely Ruben will be safe here."
Mm.
I schtipped you, too.
Uh, [laughs] I think.
I don't think I used that right.
Okay.
[laughs] Um, I, I wanna bring something up that I've been toying with for the whole episode, um, and, but I think it's important, really important.
Um, when I was a lot younger, when I was about 19, I reckon, I'm, I'm just trying to work out the time, someone I know, a similar thing happened to that happened to you.
Um, different circumstances, very different in many ways, but not a dissimilar outcome.
Um, and I am, I think I'm guilty of not doing the right thing then, and I think as a friendship group, we kind of, we didn't see that damage could be caused permanently, and that, that this could have been traumatic to this person.
And we temporarily, not at their expense, but there was joking about it and laughing, I think out of the awkwardness of not knowing how to respond to what had happened to them.
I don't think the event was ever taken as seriously as it should have been.
Um, and I've been feeling more guilty as this episode's gone on for not doing more for that person back then.
And I bring this up not to try and make this about me, but I bring it up to say, what did you learn through this process that a group of mates, 19, 20-year-old guys, or any age, if this happens to a friend of theirs, what... how could they respond better? 'Cause I think we really failed that person.
Thank, thank you for sharing that, um, because an assault w- of any kind is horrific for everybody involved, not just the person involved.
Um, um, but it is absolutely not anybody's fault other than the, the, the perpetrator's.
And, um, one of my, one of my best mates, um, who's an incredible man, Sean Larkin, he was, uh, the last person at the, um, at the apartment that night, and he, he left me on the couch at f- at 5:00 AM, and he thought, "Surely Ruben will be safe here."
Mm.
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3 of 10
Confrontation on the street
Reuben recounts the moment everything changed
Leaving the family chat
A heartbreaking rift opens with his dad
Ultimatum and redemption
A boundary transforms a father-son relationship
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