NFL Week 4, Fastest 2 Minutes, Patriots Big Win, Eagles Hit Rock Bottom, Bryce Young Is Elite Plus Who's Back Of The Week And MLB Playoffs

Welcome to Pardon My Take, presented by DraftKings.

The crown is yours.

Today is Monday, October 5th, week four.

What? What?

What? [grunting] PFT.

Did we have a game in London to start? You're bloody right we did.

We go to London, where Marcus Bloody Mariota was burning the Colts at the stake, leading the Redcoats on the attack against Les Bleus, but in a touching tribute to Big Ben, the clock, he ended up in a walking boot.

Oh, hey there, Marcus.

You want to just slip your-

Hey, Marcus

... little footsies in me? Put those little Hawaiian feet inside me-

What up, Marcus?

... like manuals on the beach.

So in came the Greek freak, Athan Kaliakmanis, who hit the defense with the spinacopa to move.

Quinton Nelson had an obsession with his running back, shoving anyone to the ground who came near his Jonathan Taylor mate.

Meanwhile, Tyler Warren Zevon was a werewolf in London.

Awoo.

Little old Jaden got mutilated late last week.

The best play of the game came when the Kalak maniac dropped back, and a what? And a what? And a, "Brandon, I'm a cold man." Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

He was rumbling, bumbling, stumbling big man.

But it wasn't enough to stave off Indie coach Carly Rae Jepsen Irsay.

Hey, I just inherited you, and this is crazy, but can I listen to play calls maybe? Who is in writing the notebook so that when us Commanders fans lose our brains, it will be there to remind us of how bad we were on this day.

Colts 30, Commanders 13.

In Chicago, back stateside, where Ben Johnson had a case of the quarterback controversy as people wondered all week whether it would be Keenum or Bagent.

And when the Bears lined up for their first snap Sunday, coach said, "Why not both?" It was ultimately Mike Tyson Bagent who played the rest of the game, telling the Jets defense, "I'll fuck you till you love me.

Welcome to Pardon My Take, presented by DraftKings.

The crown is yours.

Today is Monday, October 5th, week four.

What? What?

What? [grunting] PFT.

Did we have a game in London to start? You're bloody right we did.

We go to London, where Marcus Bloody Mariota was burning the Colts at the stake, leading the Redcoats on the attack against Les Bleus, but in a touching tribute to Big Ben, the clock, he ended up in a walking boot.

Oh, hey there, Marcus.

You want to just slip your-

Hey, Marcus

... little footsies in me? Put those little Hawaiian feet inside me-

What up, Marcus?

... like manuals on the beach.

So in came the Greek freak, Athan Kaliakmanis, who hit the defense with the spinacopa to move.

Quinton Nelson had an obsession with his running back, shoving anyone to the ground who came near his Jonathan Taylor mate.

Meanwhile, Tyler Warren Zevon was a werewolf in London.

Awoo.

Little old Jaden got mutilated late last week.

The best play of the game came when the Kalak maniac dropped back, and a what? And a what? And a, "Brandon, I'm a cold man." Da, da, da, da, da, da, da, da.

He was rumbling, bumbling, stumbling big man.

But it wasn't enough to stave off Indie coach Carly Rae Jepsen Irsay.

Hey, I just inherited you, and this is crazy, but can I listen to play calls maybe? Who is in writing the notebook so that when us Commanders fans lose our brains, it will be there to remind us of how bad we were on this day.

Colts 30, Commanders 13.

In Chicago, back stateside, where Ben Johnson had a case of the quarterback controversy as people wondered all week whether it would be Keenum or Bagent.

And when the Bears lined up for their first snap Sunday, coach said, "Why not both?" It was ultimately Mike Tyson Bagent who played the rest of the game, telling the Jets defense, "I'll fuck you till you love me.