Sexually Transmitted Disasters

All right, Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with, I am at the end of my fucking rope with people in their cars and their inability to park and the lack of spatial awareness.

I've had it.

I know I've said that before, but I've devised a whole system.

Okay, here's what happened.

Three times this week, I have parked in a parking lot that's crowded, but I go park away from it.

And then I get back to my car and everybody's over the line, you know, maybe just a smidge.

And I'm shimmying into my car like I need like lube to lubricate myself into my car practically.

That fucking pisses me off.

And then I love my fucking dog school.

I love it.

The people that go there, there's a big parking that you can, there's space for three or four people to park and just run their dogs in.

These fuckers get in the middle and they take a four spot into a one spot because that's how bad they fucking suck.

And it happened like three times this week and I fucking sat in my car and then I got out with my dog that is mean as fuck and he is like barking like crazy and I'm just looking at him.

One bitch parked behind me and I couldn't get out.

There are three other places.

It drives me crazy.

So here, I mean, like I'm in the shower last night and I'm like, I have a new plan.

This is what it's going to be.

I'm going to volunteer

my time to be the parking police and you, I'm going to send pictures of bad parkers and you get a few demerits and then you, your insurance rates go up.

Like you do not get to live in a polite society.

If you can't fucking park your car in between the lines.

And if there's a four spot parking lot and you take all four because you're that stupid and, then you shouldn't even have a car.

And maybe we should just completely think about revoking your driver's license.

That's just my little, that's just me today.

All right, Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with, I am at the end of my fucking rope with people in their cars and their inability to park and the lack of spatial awareness.

I've had it.

I know I've said that before, but I've devised a whole system.

Okay, here's what happened.

Three times this week, I have parked in a parking lot that's crowded, but I go park away from it.

And then I get back to my car and everybody's over the line, you know, maybe just a smidge.

And I'm shimmying into my car like I need like lube to lubricate myself into my car practically.

That fucking pisses me off.

And then I love my fucking dog school.

I love it.

The people that go there, there's a big parking that you can, there's space for three or four people to park and just run their dogs in.

These fuckers get in the middle and they take a four spot into a one spot because that's how bad they fucking suck.

And it happened like three times this week and I fucking sat in my car and then I got out with my dog that is mean as fuck and he is like barking like crazy and I'm just looking at him.

One bitch parked behind me and I couldn't get out.

There are three other places.

It drives me crazy.

So here, I mean, like I'm in the shower last night and I'm like, I have a new plan.

This is what it's going to be.

I'm going to volunteer

my time to be the parking police and you, I'm going to send pictures of bad parkers and you get a few demerits and then you, your insurance rates go up.

Like you do not get to live in a polite society.

If you can't fucking park your car in between the lines.

And if there's a four spot parking lot and you take all four because you're that stupid and, then you shouldn't even have a car.

And maybe we should just completely think about revoking your driver's license.

That's just my little, that's just me today.