How Dr Luke Sniewski Ended a 30-Year Porn Addiction

There's something in there for me which is about the, [clears throat] the inner driver or the inner experience of the outward achievement.

Mm.

And there's a piece of it for me that is, is the outward achievement me trying to prove to you that I'm enough, or is the outward achievement an expression of my inner joy, like me expressing myself as a human being and, and kind of m- playing with the potential that I believe I have?

I mean, that's the sweet spot, right?

Mm.

If someone is able to outwardly express their inner joy, then there's an alignment there Right? Between, between what they believe about themselves and how they are taking that self-belief and sharing it with the world.

And for me, it took about 10 careers to arrive at that alignment between what I, uh, feel, think, and how I experience myself, and how I outwardly express that with the world, because it definitely wasn't, for me at least, through professional sports.

I know that that was...

There was a misalignment there, and I'm...

Yes, I'm glad that I checked it off the list and I was able to follow through on a, on a childhood dream, but it wasn't until I was helping people connect with their emotions and explore their inner worlds, explore their own beliefs about how they are interpreting the world, that I was able to bring a congruence and alignment between, um, this endlessly fascinating inner exploration that I had been doing, and then navigating and helping people navigate that journey for themselves.

Mm.

Amazing.

We're gonna go deeper into that in this conversation.

I'm really looking forward to it.

One of the things you just said that I think is so important and that we talk about a lot on the Dare to Lead program that I run, which is based on Brené Brown's, uh, research and curriculum, uh, is the concept of integration, and that concept meaning, you know, coming from the Latin, to make whole.

And literally what we're talking about there is bringing into alignment our thoughts, our emotions, our words, our actions, and how often we find ourselves, you know, sitting in a meeting, smiling and nodding and saying, "Sure, no problem," and inside we're screaming or inside, uh, you know, we're, we're rebelling, and how freeing it is when there's no friction across all of those kind of areas of our expression.

Yeah.

Again, to, to help people pay attention to that and become aware of that is such a beautiful process.

I think that what you're getting to guide people on and bring their attention to is a really unique territory.

And what's even more beautiful than people beginning to notice that incongruence is answering the call, and that's when the, the beautiful journey of change begins, when they can say, "Ah, yes, there, this isn't aligning," and I'm curious about what Gabor Maté talks to, uh, talks about when he talks about attachment versus authenticity, a moment when they say, "You know what? Maybe my authenticity is more important than maintaining this unconscious attachment that I actually, uh, don't want in my life anymore."

All right.

We're gonna dig more into that.

[laughs]