Pamela J Peters

So how has your career developed? Um, you know, what were those influences like in college and post-college?

Um, well, the biggest influence I, I mentioned was Zig Jackson.

I don't know if you're familiar with his work, but he was a, he's a Native artist that did, um, kind of what I did with the Natives in the Indians in the City, where he...

I was doing some research on him when I was in college, and I just was like, "Oh my God, this is exactly what I wanna do." Um, I wanna continue what he started in, in San Francisco, where I saw these portraits of him where he felt invisible as a Native person living in the city, and the only way he was identified is if he put a headdress on.

And so he took these portraits where he was, um...

I saw this during my research is when he was in a, um, like a, in a, in a bus and with all these people, and he had a headdress on, and that, that was what could, um, identify him as a Native person.

And I can get into this whole, you know, conversation about Indian identity and why it's important for my work to not really utilize, um, that relic imagery.

And, um, I do that and it's, it's confusing to a lot of people.

It's more confusing to Native people.

It's kind of funny when I, when I, when, when that happens because when people see my portraits and I want to use them in, as part of history and as part of modern Indians, I don't want them to dress up in this fantasy-like image that white people like.

And I make that known, um, upfront because I've studied a lot about how Hollywood has really, um, hurt the image of who we are as Native people.

They've created this fantasy, and I always say fantasy because it is.

And when I tell people I'm Native American, I have to go down through this list and I'm just like, "Well, I'm Diné." And they're like, "Well, what is Diné?" And I say, "Well, Navajo." "Well, what's Navajo?" "Well, it's American Indian, Native American." They're like, "Oh, well..." It's har- it's so heart- disheartening when you s- hear this from a white person when they're like, "Oh, I thought you guys were all dead." It's like, how can you say that to another human being? And the reason why they think that is because of what white society has done.

They have really, um, diminish our existence, and they've done that through film and television, and they've created this relic past Indian and this fantasy Indian.

So when I was in college and I would tell these students I was Native American, they would always say, "Well, like how much are..." Uh, you know, and when you throw that in, it's like, well, how, how much white are you? [chuckles] Um, they don't understand how hurtful that is about our identity and the fact that they see us as non-existence, but then when They realize you are, I've h- I've diminished their fantasy of what an Indian should look like, and that's why I continue my work.

Yeah.

I feel [clears throat] like so many of us who, who went to college away from our communities, um, we-- I've, I've seen this now for a couple generations where we're grappling with, with a history that we weren't taught to begin with, and we're coming to terms with that.

And yet, at the same time, we find ourselves sort of like the spokespe- the spokesperson of our people with all of the questions, um, that aren't necessarily rooted in curiosity by a lot of non-natives.

And so, so many of us get put into this position where we, you know, we're, we're coming to terms of, of, of our own identity, and a- again, speaking, speaking in broad terms and subjects, um, it, it's a lot to carry.

It is.

It is, and, and I think we actually are very, um, thick-skinned.

Mm-hmm.

And the fact that we have to endure these kind of questions and, and, and, and really, like, fight to show, like, our existence to, to white people, um, it's real- it, it-- at first it was really disheartening.

It hurt, and I always thought, like, h- I thought about when I was a child, because I was placed in foster home, and I went to a all-white school, and having all these white kids, like, poke me, like, "Ooh, is she really an Indian?" And, "She's brown." And they would say, "Oh, well, where's your feathers?" And they would make the woo-woo sound to me.

And it, this is when I was a kid, and I couldn't understand that, and it was really, it was really hurtful.