Australia joins Europe?

The 22nd of September is National Elephant Appreciation Day.

Oh.

Yeah.

They won't have forgotten it, so do your bit.

You need to spend anything up to eight minutes, that's two minutes per tusk, one minute per ear and 30 seconds per leg, appreciating your nearest available elephant.

Or go online to appreciateanelephant.com where live streams of various brands of different elephants are available for you to do your appreciating.

Ways you might like to consider appreciating your elephant include... how they take the pressure off other animals trying to set new records for biggest non-defunct land mammal.

Also, you can appreciate them for hooks.

If you enjoy using hooks, use a hook.

Yeah, I use a hook sometimes.

Although I do generally tend to prefer to throw my coat directly on the floor.

But that's more to do with me being a sloppy dude.

Well, if any of you enjoy hooks, thank the elephant whose tusks inspired prehistoric humans to invent the hook as somewhere to keep their flint-based tools, pelt-based scarves and keys.

Other elephant-based inventions include the garden hose.

the military tank and the flag, which was, of course, originally based on the elephant's ear.

And also you can appreciate them because, well, as a species, we've outsourced the concept of memory to the internet and AI.

But elephants have not done that.

They are the world's leading source of memory that is not vulnerable to the inevitable total internet shutdown that is coming our way.

They're

like giant USBs.

Yeah, they are.

The average elephant stores as much memory as a 64 gigabyte SD card.

Wow.

That's a fact.

Is it? I don't know.