We Know Better. So Why Do We Keep Doing It? The Fall Refresh | Part One: The Internal Revamp

***You've lived long enough to know what works, what doesn't, and what you want. So why are you still doing some of the things you know aren't working?*** Welcome to midlife. Some days you feel 25. Other days? About 105. And sometimes both versions show up before lunchtime. I'm Rosemarie Beltz. I'm 54, living in Brooklyn, working in Manhattan, traveling whenever I can, building an independent podcast, and juggling healthcare, creativity, relationships, health, home, and all the other moving parts of a full life. Sound familiar? I'm also determined to **clock the moments**—the beautiful, spontaneous, ordinary, extraordinary moments that make life worth living. Because I'm committed to making the **next 50 years my best 50 years**. And I have no intention of missing today while planning for tomorrow. **The Fall Refresh: Let's Question the Familiar** This episode began with a conversation at the hospital. A colleague mentioned that we'd been doing something the same way for twenty years—as though that alone settled the question. And I started wondering: **How often do we defend something in our personal lives simply because we've always done it that way?** A habit. A relationship pattern. A responsibility. An expectation. An old story about ourselves. Sometimes we know something deserves another look. So why is it so difficult to change course? In Part One of our two-part **Fall Refresh**, we're exploring the psychology behind our attachments, decisions, and familiar routines—and what happens when we start questioning the internal systems guiding our lives. **In This Episode** - **The sunk-cost effect:** Why we sometimes keep investing in something because we've already invested so much. - **Status quo bias:** Why the familiar can feel more appealing than an alternative. - **Loss aversion:** How the possibility of losing something influences our decisions. - **Attachment and loyalty:** When commitment is meaningful—and when it may deserve another look. - **The stories we tell ourselves:** How our interpretations of past experiences can influence our sense of identity. - **Boundaries and self-trust:** How to stay generous and open-minded without making every personal decision a committee hearing. - **Gratitude and ambition:** Why loving your life and wanting more from it can coexist beautifully. And yes, we're talking about the experience of giving somebody else excellent advice—and then going home and doing the exact opposite. Because sometimes the person who needs a second opinion is us. **Real Science. Real Life. The Big Picture.** I'm a cardiovascular perfusionist, Columbia-trained journalist, and former broadcast medical reporter. I've spent decades working in healthcare and journalism, where evidence, experience, and asking better questions matter. But I'm also living this stage of life right alongside you. Early mornings. Long clinical days. Travel. Fitness goals. Creative projects. Wonderful conversations. An apartment I love. A calendar that occasionally has other ideas. I'm not interested in presenting midlife as a problem to solve. I'm interested in what we can do with all the experience we've earned. **We're old enough to know better. Young enough to want more. Smart enough to question the instructions.** And here's something I keep coming back to: **You can love your life and still want more from it.** More growth. More freedom. More connection. More laughter. More adventure. More of those moments worth remembering. That's what my Fall Refresh is about. Not a perfect life. A life we're actually present for. **Join the Conversation** What's one thing you've been doing for years that you've recently started questioning? A routine? An expectation? A relationship pattern? A belief about yourself? **I want to hear your second opinion.** Leave a comment, share this episode with a friend, and follow *Second Opinion* wherever you listen. And come back for **Part Two: The External Revamp**, when we take this investigation into everyday life—our habits, health, time, work, money, homes, and the systems that help us make room for more. Including the mystery of how I walked ten blocks to the gym at 34, but at 54 apparently need an operations team to travel three floors downstairs. We'll investigate. **Find me:** https://RosemarieB.com **About Second Opinion** *Second Opinion with Rosemarie Beltz* is independently created, written, hosted, and produced by Rosemarie in New York City. From a Brooklyn home studio to listeners around the world, the podcast explores health, science, longevity, relationships, work, beauty, money, and the many dimensions of midlife—with curiosity, humor, evidence, and real-life perspective. **As of October 2026, Transistor reports downloads from 90 countries.** Every episode is independently produced, and the growing global community behind these conversations means a great deal. No corporate editorial agenda. Just thoughtful questions, fascinating conversations, and the belief that experience and age are always an advantage. **Real science. Real life. The big picture.** **Research & References** The behavioral-science discussion draws on the following publications: **Sunk-cost effect** Arkes, H. R., & Blumer, C. (1985). *The Psychology of Sunk Cost.* Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 35(1), 124–140. https://doi.org/10.1016/0749-5978(85)90049-4 **Status quo bias** Samuelson, W., & Zeckhauser, R. (1988). *Status Quo Bias in Decision Making.* Journal of Risk and Uncertainty, 1, 7–59. https://doi.org/10.1007/BF00055564 **Prospect theory and loss aversion** Kahneman, D., & Tversky, A. (1979). *Prospect Theory: An Analysis of Decision under Risk.* Econometrica, 47(2), 263–291. https://doi.org/10.2307/1914185 **Narrative identity** McAdams, D. P., & McLean, K. C. (2013). *Narrative Identity.* Current Directions in Psychological Science, 22(3), 233–238. https://doi.org/10.1177/0963721413475622 *Research is discussed for context. Personal observations and reflections are my own.* 🍎**Created, hosted, written, and independently produced by Rosemarie Beltz in New York City.** 🔗 Follow & Subscribe to never miss an episode. If you love the show, leave a review—it helps others get a second opinion! 💡 Have a topic you’d love for us to cover? Reach out at www.rosemarieb.com.