#50: Covenant, Not Commitment: How the Clapp Family Built a Marriage Worth Staying In

**What does intentional family life actually look like after 32 years of marriage, six kids, two international adoptions, and a whole lot of earned wisdom?** In this episode, we sit down with Rick and Laura Clapp — coaches, parents, and longtime mentors to the Housefield family — for one of the most substantive conversations yet on the podcast. Rick is a faith-driven executive coach and strategic retreat leader. Laura is an assessment coach who spent years as a full-time mom before channeling her seminary training and life experience into coaching individuals and couples. Together, they’ve built a family and a marriage that is honest, intentional, and deeply rooted — and they hold nothing back here. They open up about what it took to keep their marriage strong through the chaos of six kids under ten, how they navigated two adoptions from Eswatini, Africa, and why the teenage years nearly broke Laura’s perfectly structured systems — in the best possible way. They get into the real differences between a commitment and a covenant, why laughter has been one of their most underrated marriage tools, and what it felt like when their adult kids came back with feedback they didn’t ask for but needed to hear. If you’re a parent who’s ever thought *I know I’m going to hear about this someday*, or a spouse who’s wondered whether you’re actually building something that will last — this one is for you. One of our favorite quotes from the interview was this (regarding parenting): **You can plant and water but you don’t control the fruit.** **In this episode:** \* Why Rick and Laura agreed early on to remove the “eject button” from their marriage — and what that covenant actually looks like in hard seasons \* How Laura thrived with toddlers and nearly tapped out with teenagers (and what changed) \* The color-coded plate system, the laminated chore charts, and the senior year “living allowance” — practical family systems that actually scaled across six kids \* Rick’s three tools for getting out of the “Valley of Suck” after hard parenting moments \* What 32 years of pursuing their kids — and each other — has taught them about control, grace, and letting go \* Why parenting is not a formula, and what it looks like to trust the process even when you can’t see the fruit yet If you’re curious to learn more about Rick and Laura’s coaching and family you can head over to this website → http://beyondsurvival.org You can also find Rick on Linkedin → Rick On Linkedin Have a question or comment to share? We would love to hear from you!You can send us an email at:**ordinaryfamilyshow@gmail.com** Here’s where you can find us online: **Websites**: https://www.colemanhousefield.com/ https://www.thenaturelabschool.com/ **Substack**:colemanhousefield.substack.com **Instagram**:abbyhousefieldcoleman.housefield.coaching This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit colemanhousefield.substack.com