Joy Lane on Six Years at City College and the Engineering of a Breaking Point

So before we get into the book, let's go back a little bit.

Six years at city college, 13 restaurant jobs, calculus three three times.

Somewhere in that grind, when did you realize your story was one that other people needed to hear?

Ugh, that's a great question.

You know, and I wish I could say that while I was going through it, I knew that this was gonna become something.

But it definitely wasn't until probably another decade later when I started working with youth, and I'll say young adults.

I get to-- I have the privilege of lecturing at a great engineering college now.

And there was this moment that happened, and it kind of just was my eye-awakening moment where I was giving a quiz, and so all I was doing was just sitting at my desk, and I was grading papers.

And a student came up to me, and before they submitted their quiz they asked if I would look over their, just their answers.

And I was like, "Uh, like I don't really do that, but okay, sure." So I, I'm looking down, and then when I look up I realize the entire class noticed, and I had a line of students waiting for me to check their work before they submitted it for a quiz, which is not allowed.

And then in that moment I kind of just was like, "Wait, everybody stop.

Are you okay?" And that was the moment when I just was looking out at this classroom of students, and they were so stressed, which I can relate to.

And then something I started seeing just, you know, in confidence, students were coming to me and just expressing all of this stress, all of this anguish, and this pressure that they had put on themselves to make it through engineering, and they really felt like they were the only one.

And, you know, I've been kind of timid about my own personal story and struggles, but it was through some of those conversations when I started opening up to students, like, "Hey, I had a hard time also," which is hard to see, I think, at this point in my life now.

So a very long-winded answer.

I think it wasn't until I started working with students who were in that exact pain point that I really realized, oh my gosh, I need to tell people that I had a hard time.

And it's really hard to start your story at the very beginning, because it's very ugly, and I didn't know what I was doing.

But I'm hoping that by being honest and vulnerable in that beginning point, what it took for me to overcome, that's really what I'm, what I'm going for.

Yeah.

It sounds like that full circle moment was where you were able to stop and reflect on your own life, and it's-

Exactly

... it's interesting to see people near us in that way, and it-

Mm-hmm

... takes us back to a time where we felt the exact same way.

Yeah.