How to Hold Someone Accountable Without Losing the Relationship

You've seen it in your meetings.

Somebody talks over the same person every single time, and everybody notices, but nobody says anything.

And you tell yourself it's because you're all being kind, and you don't want to be the one who makes it awkward, or the reason someone goes home upset, or worse, goes off sick so the moaning, well, it happens between the meetings in the corridor instead, and the thing that needs saying never actually gets said.

And it's not because you don't care, but caring for people like us has often meant just not rocking the boat.

And here's what our podcast guest, Joe Weston, says in this episode.

He says that that kind of caring, it isn't kindness.

It can be, in fact, a form of conflict, which is exactly what you're trying to avoid.

And this is exhausting because conflict avoidance means that nothing actually changes.

So whether you're running a ward, a practice, an organization, a classroom, or a team, if you've ever rehearsed a difficult conversation in the shower and then just not had it, this one's for you.

Author and conflict expert Joe Weston is back for round two.

Last time, he taught us the difference between confronting someone and conflicting with them, and this time we go further into what it actually sounds like to hold somebody accountable without becoming someone you don't like.

[upbeat music]

You've seen it in your meetings.

Somebody talks over the same person every single time, and everybody notices, but nobody says anything.

And you tell yourself it's because you're all being kind, and you don't want to be the one who makes it awkward, or the reason someone goes home upset, or worse, goes off sick so the moaning, well, it happens between the meetings in the corridor instead, and the thing that needs saying never actually gets said.

And it's not because you don't care, but caring for people like us has often meant just not rocking the boat.

And here's what our podcast guest, Joe Weston, says in this episode.

He says that that kind of caring, it isn't kindness.

It can be, in fact, a form of conflict, which is exactly what you're trying to avoid.

And this is exhausting because conflict avoidance means that nothing actually changes.

So whether you're running a ward, a practice, an organization, a classroom, or a team, if you've ever rehearsed a difficult conversation in the shower and then just not had it, this one's for you.

Author and conflict expert Joe Weston is back for round two.

Last time, he taught us the difference between confronting someone and conflicting with them, and this time we go further into what it actually sounds like to hold somebody accountable without becoming someone you don't like.

[upbeat music]