Empathy First: Mastering Life Conversations for Deeper Client Trust with Dr. Amy D'Aprix

No, that resonates, and I think that every advisor listening to this is probably nodding their head to say, "Look, I want to be that trusted advisor.

I'm dealing with clients that are going through these transitions." So far so good.

Right.

But most advisors are probably thinking that, "Look, I'm not a therapist."

Right.

"So when it comes to life conversations, what is my role in here as their financial advisor?" How do you help them make that mindset shift from being the expert with the answer, being that therapist, say, "Lie down on my couch"

[laughs]

... to being the person who asks the right questions, especially when there may be no clear answer or resolution at the end of the meeting?

Yeah.

I love that, and I love what you said, Sam, because the truth is, I, when I, when my team and I create a trusted advisor, we had two things we were speaking to, 'cause I knew that advisors said this.

We have no time, so these life conversations-

Right.

Right

... we can't get into all this.

We barely have time to have our meetings.

And I'm not a therapist.

And what I [laughs] used to say, we, we designed it to be very tight and not take time, but then what I'd say to, always say to advisors, "You don't have to be a therapist.

Matter of fact, your client's not looking for you to be a therapist.

All you have to do is be a connected human being, and you're already that.

I'm just gonna show you how to do that a little bit better than what you're already doing." So it's taking the skills you already have and, and amplifying those skills.

And one of the ways that we do that is by, by kind of reframing as clients are going through different transitions with the advisor to think about that every life transition has four implications: practical, emotional, family, and financial.

The advisor only has to be an expert in the financial.

We're not saying you have to be an expert in all of these, but to your point, you have to recognize the client is going through all of those things.

They live in the practical, emotional, family, as much as the financial.

So as an advisor, you have to figure out how to go to where the client is, express empathy, and I wanna come back and chat with you more about empathy-