180: The Hidden Ways We Control Others: Healing Codependency & Becoming Authentic with Steven Francisci

Sometimes the person standing in your way isn't someone else. It's the version of yourself that was created to survive. In this episode of the Power & Purpose Podcast, Vanessa Soul sits down with Steven Francisci—U.S. Navy Veteran, author, mental health advocate, and trauma awareness educator—to explore what it truly takes to heal from childhood conditioning, codependency, shame, religious deconstruction, and inherited identities. Steven shares the powerful story behind his memoir, From Ahole to Alright\*\*, and explains how therapy, self-reflection, and conscious change transformed every area of his life. Together they discuss: • Why trauma creates protective identities • The Codependency Triangle (Victim • Rescuer • Persecutor) • How manipulation often disguises itself as love • Religious deconstruction and questioning inherited beliefs • Radical self-awareness without self-shame • Healing the inner critic • Journaling, art therapy, breathwork and shadow work • Letting go of certainty and learning to trust life • Returning to love as your true identity Whether you're beginning your healing journey or have been doing inner work for years, this conversation offers practical insights and profound perspective for becoming more fully yourself. 📘 Steven Francisci Book: From Ahole to Alright: A Life Rewritten Through Self-Reflection, Therapy, and Conscious Change\** Amazon: https://a.co/d/0bCqfNM7 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/healingrootsonup If this episode helped you, please Like, Subscribe, and Share it with someone who may need to hear this conversation today. Chapters 00:00 Preview 02:00 Who Are You Beyond Your Conditioning? 04:10 Steven's Life Before Healing 05:20 Motorcycle Accident That Changed Everything 06:35 Suicide Attempt & Rock Bottom 08:20 Religious Deconstruction 10:05 Learning to Live with Uncertainty 12:20 From A\*\*hole to Alright 1 4:00 Childhood Trauma & Identity 16:00 What Healing Changed 18:00 Vanessa's Story of Manipulation & Victimhood 20:30 The Codependency Triangle Explained 24:30 First Steps Toward Healing 27:00 Deconstructing Your Identity 29:00 Breathwork, Shadow Work & Therapy 30:00 Journaling & Art Therapy 32:00 Discovering the Inner Critic 34:30 Love Leading the Connection 35:30 How to Connect with Steven 37:00 Final Thoughts Connect with Vanessa Soul: 🌐 Website:https://vanessasoul.com/theempire 📸 Instagram: https://instagram.com/vanessaasoul 📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@VanessaSoulWork 📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vanessa.spiva.9 Hosted on Ausha. See ausha.co/privacy-policy for more information.