Sep 22, 2026 · 25 min · 10 segments
Welcome to the Modern Husbands podcast, where any combination of Dr. Bruce Ross, Christian Sherrill, and Brian Page host national experts who share winning ideas to manage money and the home as a…
One of the things that I see happen is that, again, the language of give and take winds up masking a consistent pattern of giving and taking that goes in one direction.
People say don't keep the score, but I kind of have to push back because it's not so much about like you get a win or I get a win.
But oftentimes when that language is being brought up, what it winds up doing is kind of like masking the fact that.
we say it's not, we say it's give and take, but it's actually not give and take.
And we, we are in this consistent pattern of like one person's ambitions being prioritized, even unintentionally at the expense of another's.
One of the things I talk about also is like access to personal time, leisure, hobbies, the things that make ambition sustainable.
So we, When I'm saying about like whose ambition is prioritized, I think it's like an ideal of like whose needs, whose interests, whose wants and the support they need to get those wants are being prioritized.
in like a one-sided dynamic or overwhelmingly one person's being prioritized at the expense of the others then i think we do need to take a little bit have a little bit more um scorekeeping again i don't love the word but i think just like discussion around how is this actually playing out in practice because i think not acknowledging it is not really serving us
No, I, I, so I do one, I keep score for one thing and then everything kind of falls from that.
I find it far easier to organize everything if I'm working my hardest to make sure there's equal leisure time.
And then the second thing, it's just so hard when you're thinking about two, like a power couple, two people who have high career ambitions.
There's no way that you can say, hey, this person is who is going to be in the driver's seat.
One of the things that I see happen is that, again, the language of give and take winds up masking a consistent pattern of giving and taking that goes in one direction.
People say don't keep the score, but I kind of have to push back because it's not so much about like you get a win or I get a win.
But oftentimes when that language is being brought up, what it winds up doing is kind of like masking the fact that.
we say it's not, we say it's give and take, but it's actually not give and take.
And we, we are in this consistent pattern of like one person's ambitions being prioritized, even unintentionally at the expense of another's.
One of the things I talk about also is like access to personal time, leisure, hobbies, the things that make ambition sustainable.
So we, When I'm saying about like whose ambition is prioritized, I think it's like an ideal of like whose needs, whose interests, whose wants and the support they need to get those wants are being prioritized.
in like a one-sided dynamic or overwhelmingly one person's being prioritized at the expense of the others then i think we do need to take a little bit have a little bit more um scorekeeping again i don't love the word but i think just like discussion around how is this actually playing out in practice because i think not acknowledging it is not really serving us
No, I, I, so I do one, I keep score for one thing and then everything kind of falls from that.
I find it far easier to organize everything if I'm working my hardest to make sure there's equal leisure time.
And then the second thing, it's just so hard when you're thinking about two, like a power couple, two people who have high career ambitions.
There's no way that you can say, hey, this person is who is going to be in the driver's seat.
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