I'LL GO IF YOU GO: SOLO TRIP

But you know who didn't forget my birthday? Someone you fucked in Croatia seven years ago.

A guy I hooked up with in Portugal.

Oh, that guy.

Well, which one? The one you were in love with.

Oh, Guillermo.

No, but actually he messaged me the other day and said, do you have recs for New York? Bad news.

I still have a girlfriend, but maybe we can all hang out.

No, but this was a different guy.

This was a guy.

I've never had a threesome.

You never have? I've never had a threesome.

I've been to a sex party.

Famously, I didn't have sex at a sex party.

Right.

I've never been at a threesome.

Isn't that crazy? I've only had one.

My friend

married

the guy, which I was like, we have way more.

Do you think people are thinking about that with us? I think people think we're like sloppy whores and we're simply not actually.

You don't let anyone hit.

I haven't had sex in seven years.

Yeah, I let someone hit every six months.

I mostly have a boyfriend.

Right.