"Right Person Wrong Time" is a Myth

We are going to tackle the ultimate relationship coping mechanism today, which is right person, wrong time.

[laughs] Everyone's already triggered, I know.

We are going there.

How many of you right now are sitting, maybe you're in your car, you're walking on the treadmill, you're laying in bed, you're staring at the ceiling, and you immediately when I said that, you're thinking about that person, right? The one who got away.

The one where you're like, "Oh, if only we met three years later.

If only they didn't move to Chicago.

If only they were done with their F-boy phase.

If only, if only, if only, then it would've worked." And it's like, guys, I hate to break it to you, but I am gonna give you some tough love today, okay? We are basically gonna completely tear this concept apart because I wanna be clear, I used to be the queen of rationalizing bad situations with this exact phrase.

So you are not alone.

I wanna make you feel very, very cozy and comfy when I say I am speaking from so much experience.

Not just, you know, experience.

I am speaking from lived experience.

But today, instead of focusing on feelings, I do wanna just- I wanna look at the facts.

Why do we say it? Why do we say, "Right person, wrong time"? I think we say it because the truth is too painful to face.

It's so much easier to just blame the universe or a calendar or a ZIP code than it is to admit the harsh reality: they just didn't want it enough, or you didn't want it enough.

That's it.

That's the truth.

Like it or hate it, those are the facts.

Because be real with me here, please think about it logically.

When you are truly, deeply, madly in love with someone, when you look at them and you think, "This is my person," you do not let timing be an issue, and you don't let that stop you.

You figure it out.

You move the mount- And if someone tells you, [laughs] guys, if someone tells you, "I love you so much.

You're perfect for me, but the timing is just wrong," okay, what they are actually saying is, "I like you, but I like my current lifestyle or my current freedom or my current career more than I like the idea of being with you, and I am choosing that over you." [laughs] Let the tears fall down and wake your dreams.

It's, it's harsh.

I get it.

We are going to tackle the ultimate relationship coping mechanism today, which is right person, wrong time.

[laughs] Everyone's already triggered, I know.

We are going there.

How many of you right now are sitting, maybe you're in your car, you're walking on the treadmill, you're laying in bed, you're staring at the ceiling, and you immediately when I said that, you're thinking about that person, right? The one who got away.

The one where you're like, "Oh, if only we met three years later.

If only they didn't move to Chicago.

If only they were done with their F-boy phase.

If only, if only, if only, then it would've worked." And it's like, guys, I hate to break it to you, but I am gonna give you some tough love today, okay? We are basically gonna completely tear this concept apart because I wanna be clear, I used to be the queen of rationalizing bad situations with this exact phrase.

So you are not alone.

I wanna make you feel very, very cozy and comfy when I say I am speaking from so much experience.

Not just, you know, experience.

I am speaking from lived experience.

But today, instead of focusing on feelings, I do wanna just- I wanna look at the facts.

Why do we say it? Why do we say, "Right person, wrong time"? I think we say it because the truth is too painful to face.

It's so much easier to just blame the universe or a calendar or a ZIP code than it is to admit the harsh reality: they just didn't want it enough, or you didn't want it enough.

That's it.

That's the truth.

Like it or hate it, those are the facts.

Because be real with me here, please think about it logically.

When you are truly, deeply, madly in love with someone, when you look at them and you think, "This is my person," you do not let timing be an issue, and you don't let that stop you.

You figure it out.

You move the mount- And if someone tells you, [laughs] guys, if someone tells you, "I love you so much.

You're perfect for me, but the timing is just wrong," okay, what they are actually saying is, "I like you, but I like my current lifestyle or my current freedom or my current career more than I like the idea of being with you, and I am choosing that over you." [laughs] Let the tears fall down and wake your dreams.

It's, it's harsh.

I get it.