20 | Sylvia - Missed Miscarriage, Induction, Uterine Infection, C-Section, Postpartum Anxiety

So is there anything as far as research? I know you said you were doing a lot of research online throughout your pregnancy.

Any resources there that you would want to share? Um,

and not necessarily, I was honestly on TikTok a lot and YouTube.

Um, so I don't have like a specific person, but I would just say like any, anyone who's like willing to share like their birth experience, especially as like a bigger body person.

Um, I think it's like really powerful to, to do that because again, that's what I went searching for.

Like when I was Googling, I, of course I was like, oh, like birth stories, horror birth stories, like all the bad things.

I was searching all that.

But then I was like, yeah, I need to look like plus size birth stories.

And there's a huge lack of birth stories out there for bigger body people.

So I think it's really important, which is why I shared my story online.

I guess like I don't have resources, but I would have like advice for people is to like definitely search um like bigger bodied birth stories I think that definitely helps because we do have like a different side of the health system unfortunately and so our experience just is going to be different no matter what so being able to research that but also just being open because I feel like Throughout my whole experience, even though it was really, really bad, I feel like I came out not just stronger on the other side, but I feel like pretty good with my experience, even though it was really traumatic in the moment.

I feel like I'm very healed from it because I think I prepared myself mentally for anything to happen.

Like I talked to people at my job who gave birth.

I literally, again, I've been wanting to be a mom since I was a little girl.

So I've talked about birth with everybody.

Like I want to know everyone's birth story.

I want to know like, just any possibility I wanted to know about it.

So I was on the internet like crazy.

So I definitely kept in mind that things can change.

It may not go as planned.

And I think that kind of kept me calm throughout my whole experience.

I think if I was so set on having a specific birth experience, I would have been a lot more traumatized and I would have had a lot more anxiety around my birth.

And especially when they started talking about like a failed induction, I think I would have freaked out a lot more if I didn't know that that could have been the outcome.

Especially going into the induction, like choosing to do the induction, even though I know that there was a lot of negative inductions that I've read about, but I knew there was also a positive induction that I had read about.

So I don't know.