Hello, Effie.

Yeah, [laughs] exactly.

But I also expect others to be interesting, and tricky sometimes, and you know, like I expect people to show who they are and, and their moods and all of that.

You know, I, I, I look forward to that.

Uh, suddenly I'd lost my patience.

Suddenly fury was my new plus one.

Suddenly I felt victimized by my generosity.

[laughs]

So with Menopause Awareness Month about to begin, what would you most like to see change?

Well, I just want menopause, the menopause conversation to be had in every environment, you know, in a light but informative way, you know.

And I don't want it to be token or let's do it this month and let's forget about it till next October, you know.

Um, we've struck, Unpause has struck a partnership with Teachers Health Group, uh, the private medical insurer, and they also have nurses and midwives, and they're essential workers.

Teachers, nurses, midwives, we can't live, we can't be educated, we can't birth without them.

So I wanna have those conversations, you know, with women in every, you know, s- situation, whether they're working from home or whether they're not working, their bodies need to be working.

Whether they're working in high-pressured situations like in classrooms or in emergency departments or, you know, being there for the birth of a child, you know, those women need to feel like they're in good shape in order to deliver what we need from them.

Yeah.

Mm.

Um, and I think people, it's a bit like moving house, like you bang on about it at the time, um, because it's, it's such a difficult thing to get your head around.

And it appears that people, unless they're going through it, don't really wanna know about it.

Mm.

I really think that it opened me up to a whole other world that I, I was...

You know, and I, and I think I was rightfully naive not to even think that it would happen to me because firstly, out of all my friends, I was one of the few that didn't do the drugs or anything.

I had a very...

I had no tolerance.

Can you talk to that part of the journey and then what it was in particular about when menopause came that was really the thing that landed the heaviest?

Yeah.

They say menopause, and when I say menopause, I mean peri as well, obviously, can trigger trauma.

I don't know whether you've read about that, but it makes complete sense.

For me in my 40s, I did 23 IVFs.

So my eyes were on the IVF prize, not the perimenopause part of the equation.

And no doubt in between all of those losses and failed attempts, I was being king hit by perimenopause.

And we need to be armed with the knowledge and the understanding and the skills to support women during this phase.

In your head.

Exactly.

Look, I have some classics.

I loved...

I don't know whether you guys ever remember this book, but when I was a child, and I'm gonna throw it towards my daughter who's about to be 13.

talking about their own experiences, or are you telling them what to read?

No, there's lots of well-known people.

Kate Langbroek, Jo- Joel Creasey.

What exactly do women face during this time and why is this massive hormonal shift still so poorly managed medically? I don't

know.

It doesn't make any sense.

It's going to happen to 100% or 50% of the population.

You'd think we'd be across the fact that this is something we need to know about.

Look, we're getting better at it, but it's still not good enough as far as I'm concerned.

There's very little education.

No, we

What exactly do women face during this time and why is this massive hormonal shift still so poorly managed medically? I don't

know.

It doesn't make any sense.

It's going to happen to 100% or 50% of the population.

You'd think we'd be across the fact that this is something we need to know about.

Look, we're getting better at it, but it's still not good enough as far as I'm concerned.

There's very little education.

No, we

It

is.

So I don't blame the doctors.

I blame the system.

I blame a bigger picture thing, which is...

Us women were born to have to be strong.

If you're going to birth a child, you need to be strong.

yeah

Mm-hmm

...

if you wanna have the baby yourself." And, uh, and then he put me on to, um, the doctors that set it up with Greece.

So I, you know, um, there, there are many privileges in, in having some public influence and attention, and I hope that my story, um, you know, makes the donor egg thing, um, something that women are considering a lot earlier rather than going through what I went through, which was, um, you know, attempt after attempt and banging my head up against a brick wall of failure over and over because the, the, the re- the reality is, um, there is something so spiritually uplifting in knowing that, you know, you don't have to depend on your own body.

There, there is, uh, liberation in, in, in saying that, "I can do this.

I just need a little bit of help." There's something really brave and liberating about that, and there's something fantastic about somebody saying, "I know you can't get there, but I'll give you what you need in order to." I mean, it does take a village, and nothing proves that more than, you know, like the donor aspect of, uh, either sperm or, or egg in order for other people to have their family and live their dream.

So, you know, it's a great, it's a great thing to offer somebody, and it's a great thing to accept when your body can't deliver for you.

Stevie

Mm.

He never said, "You're a girl, therefore you should blah," ever.

It was more about character.

Um, I think he knew that I wanted to be independent from a very young age.

I started working very young.

Uh, always had a part-time job, always wanted my own money, um, wasn't afraid of work.

I, luckily, have great energy.

Mm.

[laughs] I kept my splint on.

I mean, I did something I'd never done before, which I'm sure a lot of people listening have done before.

I was at the Crown Hotel for something and had a room, and the key wasn't working to my room.

[laughs] And I was like, "It's not working." And there was, um, someone on the floor cleaning the rooms, and I was like, "I'm so sorry, I don't wanna go downstairs," 'cause it's a pretty large hotel.

"Can you please open the door?"

Mm

... which is considered the favorite album of Prince, of Michael Jackson, of some of the greatest artists of our time.

George Michael has redone some of the songs on this album.

What are you guys doing?

This is very much a Sarah Lee type of showering.

You know, it's a layer upon layer upon layer.

And it's a lot.

The big sponge, now we're going to use a bar of soap, now the liquid soap, then stop.

Then, you know, it's a process.

I get it.

no that would be that would be a no i just have always felt that i could you know clean myself in other ways like a cat lick