So let's just leave it.

It's funny how the press, I've never had stuff made up about me before.

Like, and you'd think that, you know, just going and playing traitors that surely there's not, you know, who cares? They were like, I think there was something in the papers that said I'd complained because Robin Romesh had been like teasing me.

So I'd complained to the press.

And I was like, I've been friends with those guys for like over 10 years.

They were lovely the entire show.

I didn't complain about any of my fellow players.

oh no this is not this is giving me anxiety so we're

At what point did you actually start playing music for yourself and what was the reaction to your first public performance?

I think like my first gig with a band was when I was 15.

I'd started playing drums when I was seven, trying to form bands when I was 13.

And then finally in a band that was called Pin Drop, which was a new metal kind of like influence band.

Excellent.

But with a guitarist called Matthew Butler, who was my age, but kind of exclusively listened to Joe Satriani.

He listened to nothing else.

what he brought to that and crowbar in an analogy a lot of john bryan's music is um it's like the sort of richly detailed and observational and the rest of it not not quite conventional um is that somewhere reflective of your comedy

What was the trigger to go down the rabbit hole? What was the first thing that set you off?

I think it was literally, it would have been just the algorithm gently like, leading me into it so he did a podcast for a bit yeah with jason jason ellis he's another yeah skater um and they must have had someone like seth rogan on or something so yeah i'd already watched a seth rogan nard wire interview and now it was suggesting me this and watch that and then it starts suggesting you know skaters that they've interviewed on the podcast and definitely the one that and I didn't know who anyone in this interview was apart from Tony Hawk, but I watched the whole thing.

So I was fascinated by it was when they had that Rodney Mullen, and Andy Anderson on the same episode and we were interviewing them.

And I didn't know who they were at the start, but by the end I'm like, okay, this Rodney Mullen guy is like one of the most important people in skating, clearly invented a lot of tricks.

And this Andy Anderson is kind of like the modern day equivalent of him.

And they both kind of skate in certain ways.

And hearing them talk about skating was very infectious.

that it could be a set up that yeah

Do you have a pre-show ritual?

Yeah, a lot now because I used to not at all and it really, it was my downfall at a lot of gigs and it's why I'd throw a lot of gigs.

I was going on completely unprepared.

So now it's quite extensive now.

And yesterday I was very, very, very nervous before going on my show.

Really wanted to just get on a plane and go home and not be here.

And as in not be in New York, not be alive.

How did you come up with this title? Because I don't think anybody else, any other comedian would've, uh, would've dared called a special this.

They wouldn't have dared.

They're all too scared, and unlike me, they didn't have the experience that I had when I...

I had a microwaved lasagna, and it was hot, and it tasted rubbish.

So I put it in the fridge, then I watched Queer Eye, and I got drunk.

And then at 3:00 in the morning, I was so drunk and teary after watching Queer Eye-

[laughs]

And the laugh track throws him.

Yeah

... shows before, which had all been brilliant but hadn't quite done yet, and, um, obviously John Kearns is one of my favorite comedians, and him winning the newcomer also legitimized the Free Fringe.

But the year before him was Louisa doing that show, and doing, uh, a show that she had put loads of her own money into the PR, where she didn't have loads of cash lying around.

She really went all in.

It was very easy for comics to be cynical about that and go like, "Look how much, you know, Louisa's putting into the PR for her, um, Free Fringe show." And being quite...

I think there was a lot of cynicism directed towards that show that was quite hypocritical.

You know, we were-

Yeah.

X, XFM.

And we know what time it is, James.

It's time for your classic scrape of the week.

What a venture...

Yeah, you're very, very quiet.

Yeah, yeah.

Uh, uh... [laughs] As if you're going, "A what? I didn't know you were gonna spring this on me." I beg your sweet pardon.

[laughs]

[laughs]

And what they wrote for me, uh, my name is James Acaster, which is an E-R, and they wrote James Acastor with an O-R, and I didn't notice, and it went out like that.

And what would happen then, whenever that show got repeated on Dave, is that, um, I would get a lot of people send me nice tweets all the time.

Never get anything slagging me off, which is very rare.

And I was very happy about this.

And then my mum told me that, uh, what she does every time it goes out is she also searches James Acastor on Twitter, and that guy gets a lot of shit.

[laughs]

... to be fair, were quite low-key.

[laughs]

And it all links together perfectly.

Uh, um, so I was a, I house sat for her once, which is, uh, awful to admit is, um- Really up itself.

Like really, like-

[laughs]

So, [laughs] um, we, uh, um, I, uh, I rang the doorbell.

No one answered.

So I, I, I had-- I was so-- I was in such a panic, so I let myself in.

Hello, Josh.

Now, um, Wiki races.

Um, so what we are doing is we're going from, um, from one Wikipedia page to the next.

I'm racing Ivo Graham.

Who can do it in the least moves? I've gone from X, from Angel Cake to Coolio.

Okay.

James, um, if you, do y- if you'd like to read out my order.

Mm.

Would you front up to the people that work there about what you're doing, or would you try and get away with it for a year without them noticing?

I would try and get away with it 'cause I reckon everyone's too polite to bring it up.

No one would bring it up as long as I'm not making any mischief.

So, like, if I just...

If I basically just change what shop I'm eating at each day-

James, would you like to leave us with a bit of your classic philosophy?

Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for listening to the Josh Widdicombe XFM Show.

And remember, as you go about your week, we've all walked somewhere at some point, but not all walks are the same.

Strangest place you spent New Year.

I, I don't really do gigs on New Year.

I did one once, uh, and I, I accepted it.

It was in Gloucester, which is a bit of a way away from Kettering.

I was still living in Kettering at the time.

And, um, I was like, it was in Gloucester, and my friend Jake didn't wanna drink on New Year's Eve.

So he's like, "Can I come with you to your gig, and then I won't-" Oh, do I just be hanging out with you? I was like, "Yep, sure.

Oh, yeah.

Oh

... right there.

And then they phone-- And Corby Steel Works phone up my mum and said, "Pet Rescue are kind of filming this progress." They said, "You know, if we're gonna send it to you, it'd be great if you could let them come over." So they came over to film my mum looking after the bat.

How did, how did it go?

He was also a examiner, and, um, Josh asked him what his favorite exam question he's ever set is, and he went, "I can't tell you 'cause it's on the, the new exam, but, um, I'll give you a clue.

It's all about soya beans." [laughs]

[laughs]

And had a go at me and called me weird.

So I thought David would help me cabbage him back, but he refused to.

Instead, he helped Mick cabbage me further another four or five times.

Now, I had to instead go, uh, sneakily to David's wife, and, uh, she put a key out for me-

We'll play a song, uh, before, at the break of when you set it up and before he gets home.

Well, that is, that's, that's what happened.

I put all those cabbages out.

Oh, did you, did you know them?

Yeah.

I did-- Well, I, no, I knew the groom and the bride, but I didn't know this best man, like...

And also the best man, just, uh, at this was at a different wedding, but he, uh, [laughs] a- a- as they were walking out the church, he put on shades and did, like, a cool, like, strut out the church.

[laughs]

It was easy to pick them out of the audience.

So she was on the front looking very happy, and then she's like, "Yeah, I thought of it on the way here, so I just ducked into a shop and bought some Post-its and a cabbage, and then I had to staple it on." I was like, "Where did you get a staple gun?" So I was like-

[laughs]

To this day.

Um, I, uh, for my GCSE arts, I, uh...

We had to do a project and the, the only thing we were given was the title, which was Inside.

Carry on with your plugging.

Okay then, mate.

Uh, on tour, jamesacaster.com for all the dates.

This week I'll be at Southend on Friday, Coventry on Saturday, and Winchester on Sunday.

Any others?

Joe Devlin, who was sat in front of me, Joseph Devlin, uh, he would often turn round and... 'Cause we went to the same primary school.

He would turn round and try and talk to me.

She said, "You're not allowed to do that, uh, talk during lessons.

If you're gonna do that again, then you're both getting detention." And w- I was working, and I literally was looking at my book.

I didn't see anything happen.

I just heard, "James and Joe, you're both caught detention."

Forever

[laughs]

And there was a note in it written by Mick that said, "Cabbaged again, ha ha ha." But I looked at the front of the envelope and that was not Mick's handwriting or Trent's handwriting, and I knew I recognized the handwriting from somewhere.

I was trying to figure it out, and then Trent came in and went, "Did you get the cabbage leaf that Josh sent you?"

While, while Neil cooks the food.

I will be going on a tour starting on the twenty-first of September of my show, Recognize.

Uh, this month I'll be in Salford, and I will be in Liverpool and Reading.

And later in the tour, I'll be at the Soho Theatre for a week starting on the twenty-seventh of October.

[laughs]

So, uh, they left a note say... obviously saying, "We tried to deliver this.

You weren't in.

Go to the, uh, post office." And it was perfectly timed because I have recently ordered, um, a, a book by my favorite author and a DVD by my favorite director at the same time, and Amazon had sent me an email saying, "We're delivering them to...

They will be delivered today."

[laughs]

And there was a note.

A note fell out.

That's classic.

So said that, and I had to, I had to process that and, and get all the cabbage leaves together and the napkin and put it...

I was really tired.

I just went to sleep, and then I had to get up at 8:00 in the morning to get my train.

So I woke up, like, really tired.

I had to just get up and rush to the train.

What were you meant to do?

He reckons that when I woke up in the morning and all the family had gone to work and school, I should have put the cabbage leaves back in Mick's bed and wrote, "Ha, ha, Mick, you got cabbaged." 'Cause Mick came home and was, and, and, and went, went to his mum, "Has he left a note? Has he done something?"

[laughing]

Uh, ba-balanced a beach ball on the, on the hood of the car.

And then it went back on four wheels, and then I was like, "Oh, I've crashed the car." But I thought, "I can probably still drive home." I hadn't seen the state of it yet, so I thought I'd drive home.

And then I pulled out, and then it, it, it immediately stopped in the road again, and, uh, I couldn't get it started.

So I looked in my rear view mirror, and there's a car coming pretty fast up behind me.

And then I looked ahead, and there's a car coming pretty fast towards me.

[laughing]

I was once on a dance floor where they were playing the bit with all the swears, and everyone was shouting the, uh, stuff you, I won't do what you tell me thing over and over again in a, in a pub, and then halfway through, the DJ stopped the song, and all the lights came up, and the bouncer said, "Everyone get out, please," and we all did what he said.

Oh, yeah.

So she was a real spoiled cat, and one of the things when, um, well, my singing teacher was, like, showing me around the house and what I needed to do, she said, um, "When you're going for a wee, don't-"

There's more

... no one came home, but the stairs are right in front of the front door.

So that walk up the stairs with my, with my back facing the front door is the scariest walk I've ever had to do in my entire life.

[laughs]

Went in, he was there on a swivel chair, like, like a idiot.

[laughs] I walked over, I was like, "Hello, mate.

Do you remember me?" Said, said, "Open return, [laughs] open return to London St.

Pancras, please." Think, think of that it jog his memory.

Yeah.

And then we got in the car and he went, "Right." And he said to us, "This car will not start again." This is the...

So you c- you cannot stop between now and London.

Could you-- would you be willing to say on air what happened with the tweet conversation with Weetabix and the other guy?

Oh, it's quite sad, isn't it? Well, uh, th-this, this guy tweeted me saying, uh, "Have you seen this, Weetabix On The Go?" And I tweeted back at this normal man just saying, "Yep, looks disgusting." And then Weetabix On The Go tweet-tweeted, commented on it saying, uh, "If you like, we can send you some free, see for yourself.

Just, just send us your... uh, DM us your address." So I, I fol-

[laughs]

No, no.

Well, I, I followed them and I DMed them my, my address.

But then also the guy who was i-involved with the conversation, the original guy went, "Um, I'm trying to send you my address, but, um, you, you, you, you, you don't, you don't appear to be following me.

Um, if you follow me, I'll be happy to send it."

Do you wanna read it out, James?

Uh, yes.

Uh, this is from, uh, Fluff Mitten.

We don't know anything else about him.

Fluff Mitten, if you're listening, we w- we do need a bit more information from you, if I'm honest.

Uh, tweeted at me saying, "Just had a James Acaster-style classic scrape," which I mean, this, calling it a James Acaster-style classic scrape is really, that's lofty praise-

... knowledge of scrapes, the details

... can only imag-- I mean, h- I think this guy's, Fluff Mitten, I, I don't know if it's a boy, a lady, or a man, but they, they've had a, they've had a dinner.