Why the Most Powerful Men Are the Quietest Ones

Okay, that's really interesting.

Now, you brought up not one, but several very low points in your life, right? Yeah.

One being not too long ago with your divorce, if I get it right, during COVID, which is probably one of the bigger ones, I'm assuming.

Because in my show, I've had maybe 50 guests now.

I started this year, but I've been doing a lot of interviews.

I think somewhere between 45 and 50, I'm not sure.

Most of those experiences have been business failures, but some of them were also divorces or mental health crises.

And then I think those are the hardest to overcome, especially for men.

And this is a men's show, right? I only interview men.

And the reason why I do this is because I think men need more encouragement.

Specifically, founders, we have this often... pressure burden of performance on top that really um doesn't allow us to so we we just have to perform right so in order to to maybe maybe this is not real but i think it is but um we've got this burden of performance because if we don't perform, we don't really achieve any other stuff in life.

Like I'm talking about relationship because you're, I mean, relationship is an incredibly broad term.

topic but and it includes of course romantic as well as business and all the other stuff but um we're actually i think i would argue we're simple in in in many ways we as humans we're pretty basic simple like um we just want the the basic stuff in life right to happen like get maybe get a get married, have some money in the bank account, be able to live and give, and also be able to give, right? To love and to share.

But there's a particular pressure on men to perform that is unique.

I'm not saying that women don't have their... their their own struggles of course they have but but there is there's this over emphasis on we've already have a lot of that so that's why i'm doing this show right so in your case

yeah i totally get it i mean so here's what i'd say like having listened to some of your the you know incredible interviews you've done on your show i understand that focus because men in general are are shown as examples often by their fathers or the people around them, that if you exhibit vulnerability, you will be seen as a failure.

If you talk about the challenges that you are having, the people will think you cannot actually overcome those.

If you talk about the questions you have about what you're doing, you don't know the direction you were heading.

And my experience over the last decade of building my community is that is flat-ass wrong.

I walk into a room, a powerful room of family offices, often as a speaker, a keynote or a panelist.

And I'm often the type, the person that people want to meet, not because I'm a family office, but because of the extent of those within my network.

Somebody asks how I'm doing.

I don't say, hey, I'm a bestselling author and I just left a startup.

I say, my dad's in hospice.

And I watch what happens with that curious vulnerability I put out of who actually responds and who doesn't.