Episode 26 - Navigating Hardships, Expectations, and the "Milieu"

Send us Fan Mail # The Long Burn — Episode 26: Navigating Hardships, Expectations, and the "Milieu"   Overview In this early-morning catch-up episode, hosts Joel Malin and Dr. Jonathan Wade reconnect after a brief hiatus caused by recent personal and professional disruptions. Rather than focusing on a single planned clinical or technical topic, Joel and Jonathan use their real-world setbacks over the preceding month to explore expectations, stress responses, stoicism, and how to stay grounded when plans fall apart.  Key Discussion Points - **Success at the Feeding America Conference (Kansas City):** - Dr. Wade recaps his and Candace's trip to the annual Feeding America HR and finance conference. - Representing Orchard Health, they presented on how their Direct Primary Care (DPC) model partners with Second Harvest of South Georgia to offer accessible healthcare options, decrease employee absenteeism, and expand care to food bank staff who typically lack affordable benefit plans. - Their panel received top presentation marks and attendee interest. - **Joel’s Move to Nashville & Living Displaced:** - Joel shares the nightmare move-in experience he, his wife Christy, and their infant son Gideon faced when an AC condensation line backed up and flooded their new home right before closing. - The family spent a month displaced—living out of the unfinished clinic office upstairs and later an unfinished sunroom while the damaged floors were stripped to bare concrete. - Joel highlights the emotional toll of transitioning into a single-income household, the mental taxation of caregiving with an infant, and the challenge of supporting his wife as she settles into a new community. - **The Silver Lining:** Despite the headache, the necessary renovations generated an estimated $50,000 in equity, cut their monthly mortgage by $1,200, doubled their living space, and drastically reduced Joel's daily commute. - **The Greenville Airbnb Renovation Snags:** - Jonathan recounts traveling to Greenville to prep a third short-term rental property ahead of a November 1 target listing date, only to find the backyard undone and the primary bathroom renovation untouched. - Issues with Duke Energy’s power line easement threatened a newly poured concrete pad intended for a pickleball court. - The hosts discuss contractor dependency: relying too heavily on a single point of failure (one handyman/contractor) rather than building a flexible bench of Plan B, C, and D providers. - **Control, Urgency, and the "Hamster Wheel":** - When plans slip out of our hands, the natural tendency is to compensate with frantic action. - The hosts laugh over Jonathan’s stress-driven attempts to make progress—such as aggressively crushing cardboard boxes, accidentally ordering the wrong 30-inch fireplace insert without measuring, and throwing out a TV remote in a rush to clean up. - They reflect on how performing unrelated tasks often provides an illusion of control and personal stability during chaotic periods, even if it doesn't move the actual roadblock forward. - **Sitting in the "Milieu" & Practicing Stoicism:** - Joel and Jonathan discuss the tension period—the "milieu"—between discovering a crisis and reaching its resolution. - Channeling Epictetus and Stoic philosophy, they emphasize that stress comes from our response to circumstances rather than the circumstances themselves. - True resilience is learning how to sit with unfinished problems, practicing contentment with what is available, and refusing to adopt a helpless victim mentality. Notable Takeaways & Quotes - **On Expectation vs. Reality:** *"Character comes in the conflict. And the conflict is not the issue; it's our response to the conflict."* - **On Contentment:** Contentment isn’t having everything you want; it is deciding that what you currently have is enough for today. - **On Project Execution:** If a task relies entirely on you, focus on Plan A; if it relies on outside contractors and external schedules, prepare plans A through D. Show Notes & Housekeeping - **Guest Policy:** The hosts welcome guest inquiries but note that interviews must accommodate their early/after-hours recording schedule around their primary clinical practices and businesses. - **Connect:** Listeners can submit topic suggestions or questions by contacting Orchard Health or Fire Health via social media or email.