Roughhousing Builds Male Bonding
Why boys need sanctioned backyard wrestling sessions
Jun 3, 2026 · 57 min · 15 segments
Screens aren't just hard for kids to put down because they enjoy them. As Michaeleen Doucleff explains in *Dopamine Kids*, screens can become powerful "dopamine magnets," pulling children back again…
Tammy SchamuhnHost
But like ultimately, I think you need to understand, like, and you talk about this in, in detail in your book, the kids are often engaged in screens or certain foods or habits that maybe aren't great in terms of dopamine because they're really trying to meet some fundamental needs.

And these devices promise, these foods promise the, these needs will be met, but they never do.

They just go and go and go around, and chase it, chase it, chase, but they never actually get it.

So can we talk about those needs, those seven needs that you talk about in your book? And then we'll talk about how to like-
It's in basically every animal that's been studied, and its goal is to fulfill your needs as a human.
Like one, one researcher told me, "What does the dopamine system do? It tells the rest of the brain what's gonna happen." [laughs] So if the dopamine system decides this is important, the kid becomes very motivated, very excited, very willing to work hard to get it.
And so it is there in our kids' brains to get them to fulfill what they needed to survive, what feels like survival, right? And so of course food is one of them, food and water.
But as humans, we're really complex creatures, and we have these other needs that aren't so obvious.
So humans evolved, so in a place where they had to create something tangible to survive, whether that was a tool, something to cook with, clothing.
These, working with our hands and creating a tangible product w- is a, is a survival need.
And so if we just take away the game from them and we don't backfill with helping them learn to cultivate a hobby where they are creating, then they're gonna eventually get the screen back.
So this opens up enormous b- wonderful opportunities for parents to introduce great hobbies and habits to kids, you know? Uh, but I talk about how you gotta figure out what your kid wants to do.

But like ultimately, I think you need to understand, like, and you talk about this in, in detail in your book, the kids are often engaged in screens or certain foods or habits that maybe aren't great in terms of dopamine because they're really trying to meet some fundamental needs.

And these devices promise, these foods promise the, these needs will be met, but they never do.

They just go and go and go around, and chase it, chase it, chase, but they never actually get it.

So can we talk about those needs, those seven needs that you talk about in your book? And then we'll talk about how to like-
It's in basically every animal that's been studied, and its goal is to fulfill your needs as a human.
Like one, one researcher told me, "What does the dopamine system do? It tells the rest of the brain what's gonna happen." [laughs] So if the dopamine system decides this is important, the kid becomes very motivated, very excited, very willing to work hard to get it.
And so it is there in our kids' brains to get them to fulfill what they needed to survive, what feels like survival, right? And so of course food is one of them, food and water.
But as humans, we're really complex creatures, and we have these other needs that aren't so obvious.
So humans evolved, so in a place where they had to create something tangible to survive, whether that was a tool, something to cook with, clothing.
These, working with our hands and creating a tangible product w- is a, is a survival need.
And so if we just take away the game from them and we don't backfill with helping them learn to cultivate a hobby where they are creating, then they're gonna eventually get the screen back.
So this opens up enormous b- wonderful opportunities for parents to introduce great hobbies and habits to kids, you know? Uh, but I talk about how you gotta figure out what your kid wants to do.
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