Surrendering to Sexual Sobriety Part 2

So let me throw a 12-step program phrase at you, which is progress, not perfection.

Yeah, I wore that wristband literally for a year or two.

But how is what you're talking about not perfection? you know, I'm going to do this, I'm going to get up at this time and make sure I do it just for today.

OK, I'm not going to look.

I'm not going to I'm not going to allow myself.

There is a certain element.

And again, I'm challenging you.

These aren't my beliefs necessarily.

I've got to do it right.

I've got almost rigidity, I would say.

How is it different than that?

I was incredibly humbled in this program, as I say, by having 100 day ones, because, you know, in the beverage program, I got it right from the beginning.

At some point, I realized this program, this recovery, it was going to be different.

If I didn't accept imperfection, I was going to quit the program and just go back to acting out.

There was this guy named Hal that we all love and look up to in our home group.

I cornered him one day after my 100th day one of acting out again.

I was like, I don't think I could do this.

He said, look, what if you only get this program right 10% of the time or 20% Wouldn't your life and you still be better off and everyone around you safer and better off even for just that little bit of progress? And I said, yeah.

Yeah, I can do that.

And in reality, it wasn't 10%.

It was more like 30% or 40%.

And so I just had to embrace and accept the imperfection.

That doesn't give me a green light to act out, Rob.

But it means that I have to go three steps forward, one step back.

But it's amazing how far a person can go with that approach.