How Confident People Handle Fear Differently | Trevor Ragan: #184

Yeah, no, it makes so much sense.

And this whole idea of playing it safe when you're afraid, I think resonates so much with so many people, especially our audience.

So many of us who come from broken families feel often controlled by fear where we're afraid to maybe ask the girl out.

We're afraid to, you know, go for that career.

We're afraid to whatever it might be.

It's much more comfortable to just play it safe.

I'm curious, why do we kind of default to that as humans? Why do we play it so safe?

So I think there's a lot here, and this is a topic I've been working on for almost a decade now.

And when I attack a topic like this, I go and try to find the researchers, I interview them, and really try to understand the nuance.

I would say a few things.

One is humans don't like to feel uncomfortable.

And that doesn't mean that when we feel uncomfortable, we're doing something wrong.

Like that's a very universal thing.

In different scenarios, we can overcome discomfort and stress and difficult emotions.

But overall, humans don't like feeling like that.

And that's extremely normal.

I think where we go wrong is usually it's how we interpret the difficult emotions that steer us in the wrong path.

And so a common like domino effect, and this is, I think one that everyone can relate to.

And whether it's, we're talking about learning sports, school, dealing with like a real setback in life, it's, something happens, it creates an emotional response.

Like this makes me stressed or anxious or nervous or afraid.

And then sort of our default perception of those difficult emotions is it's bad to feel like this.

Therefore, when I do feel this, that means I'm on the wrong path.

I'm doing something wrong.

Something's wrong with me.

So you kind of see that like the downstream thoughts about our emotions are trickling down from this kind of broad mindset that All difficult emotions are bad.