Jul 13, 2026 · 24 min · 9 segments
When does keeping the peace create more problems than it solves? As parents, most of us want a peaceful home. Fewer arguments. Less conflict. More connection. But what happens when "keeping the peace"…
So I mentioned this to Emily a few months ago, because I'm driving along one day with my daughter in the car and we're laughing at jokes, you know, maybe singing along to some songs, and all of a sudden it went radio silent.
And I'm like, "What just happened?"
[laughs]
She's looking out the window now, not making eye contact with me, not acknowledging me.
Oh, no.
It went from 0 to 60.
Or should I say, from 60 to 0.
60 to 0.
[laughs]
Yes, it went from 60 to 0 in a split second.
I was like, "What just happened?" Now she's not really giving me any eye contact.
She's giving me one-word answers.
Mm.
It was just like somebody hit pause, and I was like, "What just happened?" And then I was like, "Oh, this is one of those mood swings that teenagers"
Remember
... yeah, that teenagers like to do.
And sometimes there's rationale behind them, because maybe I've said no to something, or maybe, um, I've told her to go do something.
But no, we were literally riding in the car, having a good time-
Mm-hmm
... and she just turned ice cold at the flip of a switch.
Have you ever had that happen?
Um, yeah.
Yesterday?
[laughs] Yesterday.
I would say, I was thinking about this.
So I mentioned this to Emily a few months ago, because I'm driving along one day with my daughter in the car and we're laughing at jokes, you know, maybe singing along to some songs, and all of a sudden it went radio silent.
And I'm like, "What just happened?"
[laughs]
She's looking out the window now, not making eye contact with me, not acknowledging me.
Oh, no.
It went from 0 to 60.
Or should I say, from 60 to 0.
60 to 0.
[laughs]
Yes, it went from 60 to 0 in a split second.
I was like, "What just happened?" Now she's not really giving me any eye contact.
She's giving me one-word answers.
Mm.
It was just like somebody hit pause, and I was like, "What just happened?" And then I was like, "Oh, this is one of those mood swings that teenagers"
Remember
... yeah, that teenagers like to do.
And sometimes there's rationale behind them, because maybe I've said no to something, or maybe, um, I've told her to go do something.
But no, we were literally riding in the car, having a good time-
Mm-hmm
... and she just turned ice cold at the flip of a switch.
Have you ever had that happen?
Um, yeah.
Yesterday?
[laughs] Yesterday.
I would say, I was thinking about this.
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3 of 4
Six Steps Toward Mom
Emily describes unexpected camp reunion heartfelt moment
Resisting the Quick Fix
Erin grapples with fixing daughter's cold silence
Choosing Worthy Battles
Erin explains figuring out teen conflict boundaries
+1 more clip · 2 min 11 sec of audio in all
7 of 17
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