170. The Hot Girl CFO's Guide to Facing Your Finances

So what was your relationship to money previously? And like, when did it shift?

Yeah, so part of that... period of time where I was doing a whole bunch of self-development, a whole bunch of business development, most of that was around money because I work with money.

And so my relationship with money, I would say growing up, I've always had a good relationship with money as far as believing that it's always going to be there for me, believing that it is a resources outside of just physical cash.

And that's very much a privilege that I grew up with.

But a lot of it was, what does it mean for me to be a business owner who teaches about money that isn't actually making any money? My expertise is in money.

I have a But they don't teach you how to build an actual business and get clients and do all the things just because you know about accounting and debits and credits and P&Ls and balance sheets and stuff like that doesn't mean you know how to make money.

So just because I knew how to balance a set of books doesn't mean that I was actually successful.

And that was really hard for me as far as an identity as a money person and not making any money.

So...

There was a lot of deprogramming the shoulds and the progress that I felt like I should have been making at the time that I wasn't and success.

And what does that mean? And how can we have success outside of the capitalistic definitions of it and all of those kinds of things.

So I'm still very much a work in progress, but I feel like I have come to a place where I can send out a $70,000 proposal and not lose my shit about it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it takes practice.

It's definitely one of those things that I think everyone has different experiences that they grew up with of like how they identify with money.

But it is such a common obstacle for a lot of people where it's like you either don't For me, at least, like I just avoid like I'm an avoider of finances and I have to practice just like showing up and doing the thing, even if I don't want to do the thing.

And like microdose, if you will, like money in that way to make it not so scary, because there's just so many things that make it feel scary.

like I've heard people say before like neutralizing money so that it's not this big thing that we are putting such a words are not coming to me but like such an emphasis on this thing when really like it can be a neutral thing that we're just like looking at without making it part of our identity that I think is what we get so caught up in it's like this is my worth this And because it's money, that makes sense to us, right? This amount of money is what I'm worth because this is what I'm being paid.

And if you can get to the point where you're just like, no, this is just like what's flowing in and out, like this is neutral.

I think that for me, at least has helped me get like closer to like a better relationship with money.

Absolutely.

And for a long time, my purpose, the goal that I was trying to get to was money feeling pleasurable and fun and actually good in the body.

And that was a lot of the practices that I would implement and getting in the bath and checking my bank balance from a gorgeous bubble bath with my favorite drink or whatever, or playing music, just really soothing the nervous system over and over again until it doesn't really even touch my nervous system anymore.

And in that way, swinging from negative to positive, it's landed in the middle of neutral for me because my practices are not so focused on making it this big, amazing, beautiful experience.