Examining how gender shapes expectations of artists within the music industry with DJ Spicy Prawn

So firstly, I wanna ask you about the posting online.

I think that was a good kind of-

Mm-hmm

... way in, firstly.

So posting on Instagram, you said, was definitely one of the hurdles to overcome because you are sharing your passion, and you're being vulnerable online in front of people that you don't know.

And I also had this when I started posting about Kiki's World and showing my face and my thoughts and my ideas, and it is really anxiety-inducing, I found, because you are, you're not, like, hiding behind anything.

You're, you're kind of taking hold of your identity, like you said, and you're committing to it, and you're saying, "This is me and this is what I'm doing." And, um, the public perception needs to matter a lot less than perhaps what's it, what it once did.

So what is your relationship with that now, with your kind of onscreen identity and self, and how has that changed since you started posting? And what are the, what are the fears that you had posting originally, and how has the shift maybe been a really good, I found, character development in detaching yourself from what people think and strengthening your character in ways that ripple from not just online, but actually also in, in your day-to-day life as well?

Yeah, I mean, I guess, like you said, like when...

I think when you're doing those first posts, it's very exposing and you feel quite vulnerable because you're like, "Shit, I'm actually doing the thing and everyone's gonna see." Especially 'cause I [laughs] on my, on my account, I didn't make a new account.

It was just my, like, original Instagram.

So 'cause I think sometimes posting to strangers is actually easier.

When you've got a load of people on there that you know already, who maybe, like, know you from school, or you just know them, who, like, you're like, "Oh, they might judge you," because they...

Yeah, they have, like, I guess, a bit more context to you 'cause maybe they've known you from, like, a specific period of your life or something.

But I was also, like, I, at that point, when I first started posting, I was already following a lot of DJs, and like, had maybe, like, met a few people that I was like, "I kind of wouldn't mind if they saw, [laughs] saw my video." And I was like, "Okay, I'm just gonna keep with my..." So my personal Instagram kind of has become my artist Instagram.

But yeah, I think definitely the beginning as well.

Like, um, 'cause I think, kind of what we said before, like when I would record things, I honestly have recorded things, like, again and again and again because I'm, like, looking at how I look as well.

Like, 'cause I mean, I'm quite into, obviously, like dressing up and, like, wearing fun outfits, and I feel like that was always gonna be part of when I post my blend videos.

Like, I was never gonna be, like, a messy room gal.

Like, it was always gonna be, like, kind of aesthetic vibes.

So yeah, I think it's just, like, selling it to the camera.

'Cause at the beginning, the first few takes, I would look at it and I'd be like, obviously 'cause I would be shitting myself, I would just look a bit like it wasn't like [laughs] I was just, like, wasn't much energy going on.

And I'd be like, "No," like, "I, I, I'm, I have to give the vibes."

[laughs]

So it is that thing of bit, like, faking it till you make it, where I'd just be at the camera and I'd be like, "Whoo," like, "Yeah," [laughs] and, like, really giving it, like, 100%.