I Just Wanna Be Securely Attached

[sighs] Okay, Anon, when I first read this dilemma, my mind went straight to relationship anxiety.

Oh, yeah.

Is this something that we're familiar with?

No.

Maybe not

notWell, this is a definition from the Attachment Project, and attachment being the key word, we're gonna get there in just a moment.

But relationship anxiety describes persistent worry about a relationship even though there's nothing wrong.

Oh, yes, yes.

We talked about this before.

We talked about relationship OCD.

Ah, okay.

Relationship anxiety and OCD is, are different things slightly, but this can be especially intense in ambiguous dynamics such as situationships.

When relationship anxiety is high, it can feel like an all-consuming unease or an emotional rollercoaster.

Mm.

So since relationship anxiety isn't a diagnosis like relationship OCD, there's no formal checklist of signs and symptoms.

However, people with relationship anxiety share a few common anecdotal experiences, okay? So excessive reassurance-seeking.

So, "Do you still love me? Do you still like me?" [laughs]

[laughs]

You're laughing.

You just, you just- Does this sound like you? [laughs]

Yeah.

Okay, great.

Self-silencing, so suppressing needs, people-pleasing to ensure acceptance.

Mm.

Over-analyzing their partner's words or actions for signs of trouble, catastrophizing or assuming the worst-case scenario, looking for reasons to end the relationship, and being unable to enjoy the present moment.