Play as a Path Back to Desire: How Fun Reignites Your Sexual Intimacy

So let me just start there by saying novelty.

The brain runs early passion on dopamine and novelty.

We have worked on Erin and Aaron's research to show you this the last few weeks.

But it's this charge of the new and not yet known, right? And then as partners become deeply familiar, the novelty charge naturally quiets, which is normal, not a failure at all.

but other people have studied.

Charlene, Kim Sawchuck.

The clean finding here is from Amy Moise, and it's that shared novel and exciting activities boost not just closeness, but sexual desire.

And that is so important for you to hear because it's seriously something that you don't really get to hear the research on a lot, where you just go, okay, I am thinking about how...

I want to be closer and I'm thinking about how maybe I don't desire my spouse that much, but it's really tied to something you probably haven't been thinking a lot about, which is these novel and exciting activities.

Because you're like, oh, that's great.

It'll bring me closer.

But like, yeah, it's sexual motivation that you need too, right? And you are really in the right spirit when you are focusing on Not just, hey, sex is allowed to be important, but we're allowed to be playful together in and out of the bedroom.

So remember, novelty or newness reactivates, again, that early relationship dopamine reward system, and it relinks it to your partner, not just other people that you're thinking about.

And we don't want you thinking about other people.

Come back to your partner.

And especially because that's useless to think about other people.

Your partner is your partner.

So tag them in your brain as a source of aliveness again.

So your play won't just be frivolous or like I said, landing elsewhere, but neurologically fuel you for wiring together with your partner.