Jul 7, 2026 · 29 min · 12 segments
Have you ever tried to do something good for yourself, only to feel guilty the second someone else had a reaction to it? In this episode, I'm answering listener questions about what happens when…
This first one said, I started waking up an hour earlier to work out before – I've started waking up an hour earlier to work out before the kids get up.
But my husband made a comment last week about how nice it must be to have an hour to myself.
And he said, And now I feel like I have to defend it every time my alarm goes off.
How do I hold on to this new practice without it becoming a whole thing? Oh, I love this question.
And obviously I was sharing in the last episode how working out in the morning has been such a routine in my life and that my kids had such a front row seat to it that it's actually one of their like treasured childhood memories I think at this point is getting to come downstairs and be a part of that sometimes with me.
So here's what I would say to this listener is first of all, The workout isn't actually the issue at all, right? What you're doing with that time is not the issue.
The issue is that that hour now requires like a legal defense every single morning, right? It feels like you're in a debate where you have to re-earn, re-defend the decision to take this hour to go and work out and kind of make it count and prove that it's worth it over and over and over again.
One is the phrase, is this okay with you? And the other one is the phrase, I need this.
I need this hour in the morning for myself to work out, to feel like a human.
Contrast that with, is it okay with you if I take an hour in the morning to work out? It's not the same conversation.
One of those two conversations is like implies that permission is required and you're kind of inviting a vote.
You're saying, what do you think? Is this okay with you? It's almost like a parent-child frame of, am I allowed to do this? And of course, at that point, they could say, no, it's not okay with me.
This first one said, I started waking up an hour earlier to work out before – I've started waking up an hour earlier to work out before the kids get up.
But my husband made a comment last week about how nice it must be to have an hour to myself.
And he said, And now I feel like I have to defend it every time my alarm goes off.
How do I hold on to this new practice without it becoming a whole thing? Oh, I love this question.
And obviously I was sharing in the last episode how working out in the morning has been such a routine in my life and that my kids had such a front row seat to it that it's actually one of their like treasured childhood memories I think at this point is getting to come downstairs and be a part of that sometimes with me.
So here's what I would say to this listener is first of all, The workout isn't actually the issue at all, right? What you're doing with that time is not the issue.
The issue is that that hour now requires like a legal defense every single morning, right? It feels like you're in a debate where you have to re-earn, re-defend the decision to take this hour to go and work out and kind of make it count and prove that it's worth it over and over and over again.
One is the phrase, is this okay with you? And the other one is the phrase, I need this.
I need this hour in the morning for myself to work out, to feel like a human.
Contrast that with, is it okay with you if I take an hour in the morning to work out? It's not the same conversation.
One of those two conversations is like implies that permission is required and you're kind of inviting a vote.
You're saying, what do you think? Is this okay with you? It's almost like a parent-child frame of, am I allowed to do this? And of course, at that point, they could say, no, it's not okay with me.
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