Caregiving Juggle: Wisdom for Next Steps

One of the reasons caregiving feels so overwhelming is because it's often described as if it's just one role.

Someone might say she's caring for her mom or he's helping his wife or they're taking care of their dad.

And that sounds simple enough from the outside, but...

You know, you're a caregiver.

It's not one job.

It's more like several part-time jobs stacked on top of the life that you were already living.

You might be the scheduler, the driver, the medication manager, the advocate, the researcher, the bill organizer, the family communicator, the meal planner, the errand runner, the safety monitor, and the person everyone calls when something changes.

And at the same time, you might still be a spouse, a parent, a grandparent, an employee, a business owner, a church member, a friend, a person with their own home health emotions and responsibilities.

That's a lot.

So if you feel overwhelmed, I want to say it clearly.

It might not be because you're doing it wrong.

It may simply be because you are caring a lot.

Sometimes caregivers are hard on themselves because they think, I should be able to handle this better.

But when you step back and actually name everything that you are managing, it makes sense that you are feeling stretched.

Caregiving is not just the visible tasks.

It's the constant awareness that someone you love depends on you in a very real way.

That awareness follows you into the grocery store, to church, into work, into the middle of the night, and even into the moments when you're supposed to be resting.

You may physically leave your loved one's house or facility, but mentally, you're still carrying questions.

Did they eat today? Did they take their medicine? Was the new symptom something to worry about? Should I call the doctor? Is it time to bring in more help? Am I missing something? Oh, the questions, they can go on and on and on.

That is the part of caregiving people often don't see.

I think the mental load is one of the most exhausting parts of caregiving.

A task list can be written down.

You can check things off.

You can see progress.

But the mental load, it's different.