Yeah

... hope, I hope that America, um, opens its eyes and pays attention to the bribery that's happening, to the, uh...

Geez, I just think Donald Trump has only helped himself in this election, not, uh, the average American person.

Yeah.

Oh yeah, of course.

And just a really fun writer, fun book.

Um, I, I typically would not be one wanting to read an actor's memoir, but it is very well done and funny, and you really see the correct decisions he's made in his career and the terribly awful decisions he's made in his career-

Yeah

... hope, I hope that America, um, opens its eyes and pays attention to the bribery that's happening, to the, uh...

Geez.

I just think Donald Trump has only helped himself in this election, not, uh, the average American person.

Yeah.

"Oh yeah, of course." And just a really fun writer, fun book.

Um, I, I typically would not be one wanting to read an actor's memoir, but it is very well done and funny, and you really see the correct decisions he's made in his career and the terribly awful decisions he's made in his career-

The inaction, not just the inaction, but the action towards making it worse.

Yeah.

And you're kind of damned either way.

I'm damned if I fall for the Lake America bait.

But also it is important to me.

You know, I'm I don't want to spend time talking about the reflection pool.

Yeah.

So, Michael, what's something you've watched, read, listened to, argued about, or just been on your mind lately that you want to tell to our amazing listeners who have been craving content over the last month?

So when you're journaling and you have this book of 50, 60, 100 pages, how do you go back to find the joke that you know that you need? Do you just find yourself rereading your journal a lot and then typing it out?

No, you finish the journal, you put it somewhere, and you forget about all the jokes, and you can never find the journal again.

So you're right.

Now, I will say, strangely, the way the human brain works, a good joke somehow makes its way back up to my brain again.

I mean, just this last Tuesday, I was performing a new joke show, and I remembered this joke that I probably wrote 11 years ago that is in one of those journals somewhere.

There is a beauty to searching a joke Halloween every year.

I press control find on my documents, Halloween, and a hundred Halloween jokes come up.

That

So when you're journaling and you have this book of 50, 60, 100 pages, how do you go back to find the joke that you know that you need? Do you just find yourself rereading your journal a lot and then typing it out?

No, you finish the journal, you put it somewhere, and you forget about all the jokes, and you can never find the journal again.

So you're right.

Now, I will say, strangely, the way the human brain works, a good joke somehow makes its way back up to my brain again.

I mean, just this last Tuesday, I was performing a new joke show, and I remembered this joke that I probably wrote 11 years ago that is in one of those journals somewhere.

There is a beauty to searching a joke Halloween every year.

I press control find on my documents, Halloween, and a hundred Halloween jokes come up.

That

Serena Williams is returning to pro tennis.

Wild.

I, wild to me.

Um, she...

Is she tied for all time? No, she's second place for all-time Grand Slam.

She's at 23, and I believe Margaret Court, who played, like, 100 years ago, has 24.

And definitely, definitely, definitely Serena Williams is considered the greatest of all time.

... and maybe pick up some tennis terms.

Swims so gently.

All right, that's enough of that.

I can't hear anymore or else I'm gonna, I'm gonna puke.

But, uh, yeah, I just...

I...

G- good job, Rafi.

It makes me like him even moreI do get really annoyed particularly now when artists are not speaking out.

[laughs]

Yeah.

So that's like...

That's just to go get... to go get dressed for the day.

There was a lot of competitiveness.

There was a lot of, um, competing and in comedy it's, to use a tennis term, it's both served me, it helps me, it motivates me, it drives me, and it's hurt me.

I mean, it's...

You know, there are times to collaborate.

Yeah.

I, I guess his team didn't have any control over what photo they-

"The magazine wrote a relatively good story about me, but the picture may be the worst of all time." Capitalized.

"They disappeared my hair and then had something floating on top of my head that looked like a floating crown, but an extremely small one.

Really weird.

I never liked talk- taking pictures from underneath angles, but this is a super bad picture and deserves to be called out.

Why are they doing this and why?" Yeah, I mean, it is.

All that our country did to these people.

Yeah, it's so terrible that we, like, threw liquid fire on their crops, their homes, their kids.

Yeah.

No, New York is rowdier.

It's got that, uh, it's got that reputation, um, and yeah, that was, uh...

I, what I find interesting about that is the fact that that man refused to apologize.

I don't know, that's in the zeitgeist a lot now.

Um, so we'll move on.

What, what, what's interesting about this topic from day one is that, um, it feels like Trump has done so many things that should bother people, but this is the one that his own party is really, uh, f- fixed on.

And hey, I'm all good if they want to get fixed on this, good, but they should also get fixed on the other stuff, like sending federal troops in to enforce local law.

... and all of the, the whole hippie freedom of speech, l- flower child movement.

Mm-hmm. I did a piece for The Daily Show w- after Biden won, and this woman in, um, New Jersey had up 10, 15 flags, "Fuck Biden, f- f- fuck Joe Biden, fuck Joe Biden" flags, was in a cert- uh, was- was on a path to a school and a lot of parents said, "Take down the flag." She said, "It's my First Amendment right." Got all messy. Court, uh, the city made her take it down, she refused. NAACP popped in to defend her, saying it was her right as a, Biden as a political figure, but then it became an obscenity. It was a very interesting piece. And I spoke to her, and she was very outspoken, and I, my whole take was like, "Hey, just, f- maybe let's say legally you can put those flags up, but it's just kinda shitty, right?" And she was like, "Fuck you, I'm gonna put my flags up." But interesting when obscenity mixes in with school, kid.

Oh, yeah.

The shit you see. You know, last January our front door was broken, it didn't lock all the way. It was broken for 18 hours, okay? No one knows it's broken. Just, just our building, so only three apartments. Somebody checks the door, it's not locked, they go up to our hallway, they steal all my family's winter coats, including mine. Okay? This is heart of January. So, we're as a family, we wake up, let's go to the park, let's do whatever. We open the door, where we kept our, our coats in the hallway, everything's gone. So it's like, holy shit, it's the middle of January, all our shit's gone. I call the detective, the cops come, whatever. He's like, "These motherfuckers walk up and down the street every night checking for every door just to see if something is broken." Year and a half later, I've been looking for this one coat that I love, this Scotch & Soda multi, uh, um, color pattern coat. I love it. I'm just looking online for my coat, right? Someone's gotta sell my coat. So I find it on Poshmark. The coat. I don't know if it's my coat, but it's the exact same coat, which you can't find at the, at Scotch & Soda anymore. I buy it. It comes from my neighborhood from a woman. She sends, sends it to me. I put it on, my wife is like, "That is your coat. 100% that's your coat."