Do you think that the root for so many of us is not doing the things that we know we need to do is, is that kind of purposely holding ourselves back? Like

it can be very unconscious.

It can be so subtle that you just don't know it.

You know, somebody can find themselves just in a pickle and I, and I'll have, you know, clients who, their loved ones telling me, well, they're doing it on purpose or they're manipulating it.

And I'm like, no, nobody does something on purpose.

Nobody intentionally manipulates.

Our behavior and our choices are very quiet vehicles and roads of communication.

But how do we move past that, the truth in that, the ownership of that? And not for other people,

B? You have to plan.

You have to know that you're going to try something new.

And you have to have a buy-in to think, okay, our brain can play a movie and the movie might be the Titanic.

And you might know what's going to happen at the end of that movie.

And so I know, I know in my temperament and my personality, I'm a ruminator.

I know that.

I get it honestly from my dad.

We're

Well, I've learned from her, so.

Let's maybe go back to the beginning, because you mentioned that I was a Livvy loser.

And why was I? Now, I had heard the word on the street before, Gina's name was dropping everywhere you know in Uxbridge I was like hearing her name there and here and everywhere and Uxbridge Ontario is very actually very close to where Gina lives and I was noticing that people were looking happier had more energy had a bit of I don't know, sparkle about them.

And it had been a period where I haven't seen these people for a while because of COVID.

And Gina's name kept on coming up and kept on coming up.

And I was thinking, my goodness, this program sounds really, really good.

And I see a lot of clients in my private practice where they want to change and they want to embark on change.

It's unfamiliar,

The psychology part of it is huge.

Huge.

Huge.

Humans are psychology.

Um, and to remind everybody how just a- an easy way of thinking about psychology, apart from the sort of bit behind the, the computer screen.

But we- what we're trying to do and what I hope and how I believe people get more successful in this program and, and any endeavor in their life is to, to slow down and to start noticing these particular parts of a human.

What are our thoughts? H- what are we thinking? And thinking and our thoughts are very different to our feelings, so we want to get, get better at discerning the difference to think, okay, I, you know, when I'll say, "Well, well, what happened here?" Okay.

Yeah.

Beverly, to finding those moments and seeing those glimmers?

I think, first of all, it's even having this conversation to think, oh, yeah, we've got to be a little bit intentional.

You know, if we want to see a little bit further away, we want to remember to bring our binoculars.

So it's about being ready in the morning.

to see those moments and to seize the day and to let go of those if we want to call them the summer shoulds to think okay I'm going to not fall into the trap of summer shoulding I'm going to look for what today does bring what is the weather like you know what does the sky look like what have I got on my plate am I at work today am I at home today who's around and be intentional because we often as we've mentioned before we often miss the magic moments because we're on autopilot And so we want to notice that there's still a piece of bread in the fridge or there's still milk in the cart.

And we want to notice that the lawn doesn't need mowing today.

Whatever those things are can be very subtle, but we've got to be there to be ready to absorb them.

You know, how do we is there a trick that we can, you know, have our mind go somewhere different? How do we keep this feeling? How do we keep that that that whatever that might be, whatever that feeling is going?

that

nobody knew what it was.

And she probably didn't even know what it was.

And it was when I was 11 and it was time to go to high school.

because we go younger in Britain.

And it was awful.

Like it was the most awful time of my life.

Dr. P, you gonna shut her down for us?

Yeah.

Um, people still accidentally do the doing during the day, and then when the, the, the house goes quiet, we, we just neglect to realize the importance of sleep, and then we're going to pick the Netflix or the relaxing, or I'm just gonna have time to myself because it just hasn't happened.

So we're like, "Finally, everybody's asleep.

I can have some me time." And just like Ilana said, we've got to reverse engineer that to think, okay, how can we expect change to happen if we don't change the day, if we don't look at the, the...

how our day moves and actually put in place some different structure.

Because if we can have the walk with the cows, if we can have the, the quiet 3:00 moment where we, we do h- do our worry journal, or we think through the things that might keep us up at, at, that night, then we're actually, um, leaning into ourselves and not waiting, um, to care for ourselves at the wrong time of, of the day.

Because that bit of sleep is so important.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm

... maybe our circumstances have changed.

Perhaps we're looking after our parents, perhaps we're empty nesters.

Um, maybe we find ourselves single or coupled.

How have we changed? And have it on a piece of paper so that we know it.

You know, we, we have these fancy little, like, Facebook reminders, don't we? The then and...

the then and now, um, photographs, and that's often when we're like, "Wow, look, look at how much has changed." Um, maybe it's not just the length of our hair, maybe it's not just the backdrop that's behind us, but unpack that and think, okay, what has? And maybe we do write, okay, inevitably our age has changed.

Mm

Yeah

... "that email today?" And the third part of our brain is the monkey brain, the attachment.

"Am I feeling c- supported? Am I feeling like I have unconditional love around me? Am I worthy? Do I feel worthy and loved?" But that little mouse really does like feedback, okay? So anybody that says, "Oh, I don't need, I don't need, um, somebody to say well done," or, "I don't need to set..." But we do.

We really do.

And so that novelty is probably part of that loop, the loop of, of am I doing it? Am I doing it? Um, and now when we're in this era, and probably lots of your members have heard about, like, weight training and adapting, we have to change in order to change.

We need to move into that uncomfortable in order to adjust.

So if we, if we're building weights in our arms and our legs, once it starts getting easier, we want to load up, because we want to put a little bit more, um, need on our body.

Well-

Mm

... like that, oh, lack of motivation.

And we're going to be slowly addressing all of this so that together we can holistically manage the thoughts and feelings and behavior that have probably held you up in this journey.

Because we are so creatures of habit, we are hardwired with our negative thoughts and our negative dialogue, that Gina and the, and, and the team are going to help you start thinking differently.

And I wrote it w- when we were tuning on.

I thought sustainable change isn't willpower.

No.

It's wiring.