From the WE United Summit: Let Them, Let Go, Let Me with Carla Howard

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So let's start out by talking about this idea of let them.

How many of you have heard Mel Robbins talk about let them? Yeah, just about every hand goes up.

Here's what's really interesting.

She's not the first person to talk about this idea of the let them theory.

There are dozens of books, journals, artwork.

Y'all, people have let them tattooed on their arms, right? I've seen lots and lots of...

hubbub around this idea of let them.

And anytime there's a lot of hubbub, there's some good talk.

And then there's some folks that are like, I kind of don't love that.

And the thing that gets misunderstood is let them is not about allowing a toxic situation.

You heard Amy and Monica and Jackie talking about some real things that are happening in our world.

doesn't mean we just let them happen.

What it does mean is that we understand what we actually have control over, right? So let them is always about other people.

It's about other people

having

an opinion, an idea, saying or doing things.

let go is about me not trying to control them.

Anybody ever get caught up in ruminating about, I'll just talk about work.

Won't even touch home yet, but just think about work.

Thinking about what your coworkers are saying.

What are they doing? What's your boss doing? Are they promoting you? Are they paying attention to your contributions? Are you bumping along at a 5% raise every year, even though you hit your metrics? And you obsess about, how can I get them to recognize my work? How can I get them to make a different decision? Anybody ever been there? Anybody ever been laid off? Let go.

Yeah.

And what happens? We ruminate about that.

Why? Why me? What about that conversation? What if I would have done something different? Let go is letting go of the control that we automatically want to have over everything.