#2: Why Smart People Keep Repeating Patterns They Already Understand

Now here's why I'm so fascinated by this.

For almost two decades, I've worked with extremely smart, high-capacity business owners, executives, and professionals worldwide, people who are self-aware as hell.

[laughs] They don't need me to point out the obvious.

Most of the time they can tell me exactly what they're doing.

They can often tell me why they're doing it.

They've read the books, they've done the personal development, they've worked on their mindset, they've gone to therapy, they've hired coaches.

They have thought the shit out of this thing, and yet the pattern can still be sitting there, which taught me something really incredibly important.

You can understand yourself brilliantly and still be operating from something you haven't changed, because insight is not the same as interruption, and awareness is not the same as choice.

Now, this is where really intelligent, self-aware people get caught because we've been taught to believe that once we understand why we're doing something, we should be able to stop doing it, right? This is what we all say to ourselves.

I know I do this.

I've already worked on this.

I know where it comes from.

I've talked about this in therapy or wherever.

I've journaled the living hell out of it.

I thought I was already over this.

I know better, so why in the world am I doing it again? And that's where the frustration comes in because when you're smart, understanding things has probably served you extraordinarily well.

You learn quickly, you connect the dots, you solve problems, you figure shit out.

So naturally you approach yourself the same way.

If I can understand the problem, I can solve the problem.

Except you cannot think your way out of something you're still consciously choosing.

And before you come for me over the word choosing, stay with me because I'm not saying you're sitting there consciously saying, "You know what would be fun today? Undervaluing myself," or, "I think I'll completely overthink this perfectly good decision." [laughs] "Maybe I'll sabotage this opportunity I've been asking for." Of course not.

I'm talking about something much more subtle, because one of the fundamental principles behind everything I teach is this: in every moment of every day, we always have choice.

Always, always, always.

The problem is we don't always realize we're choosing, and we certainly don't always act on the choice that's available to us.

Instead, we operate automatically from what feels familiar, from what feels normal, from what we've done a thousand times before, which means you can intellectually understand a pattern and still operate from it You can know you undervalue yourself and still charge less than you know you're worth or take less money for the job.