TFMR: The Uncommon Experience

And I think it was when you said, you know, this spina bifida is not a fatal, quote unquote, not a fatal diagnosis or it's, you know, it's not fatal enough.

And it reminded me, Alison, of what you sort of were saying about how, you know, the relief of getting, OK, this is what it is and it is fatal and how navigating these challenges.

And I just think to have these laws in place that sort of say, well, we're going to judge whether this is deemed bad enough to allow you to make these choices.

That's what it feels like it's boiling down to, really.

It's like we're deciding by law if we're going to allow you to make these choices about your family, your child, your body, your life.

And it's just a terrible thing to be positioned to be put in.

It makes me feel quite angry as well.

You're going through enough.

And it reminds me of what's happened recently.

And so we're recording this now at the end of the week when there was that couple that came out in the US talking about their pregnancy and deciding to terminate their baby was given a diagnosis of T21.

And I'm sure they had many messages of support, but there was also many messages back.

not supporting them and also women coming out and saying, well, I chose to stay with my pregnancy.

So Alison, I'm thinking of you of having both experiences or, you know, I, other people saying I would never choose this.

You know, I would always, you know, love my baby.

And, and yeah, it's just making me think about how you don't know until you're in it, the things that can go wrong and the decisions that you're going to have to make, you know, to choose.

Yeah.

100%, I would have supported people that would have said to me, I actually voted no in the referendum, but I never thought I'd find myself in this position.

And they have then gone on to choose to terminate the pregnancy.

So even though you think you might until you're actually presented with it.

And I think, I also think people have this narrative in their heads that people choose a termination because they don't want the condition.

But it's actually because you love your baby so much that you don't want them to suffer.

Because I know there's this phrase that people say, oh, such and such has this condition and they're the light of their...

And it's like, yes, and I'm quite sure my baby would be too, would be the absolute light of my life.

But I didn't want to put him through any of the suffering that he was going to have.

And people, the T21 diagnosis is very complicated.