So just as we did with Aspen and Bash, we used Ileana.
She is the most incredible sleep consultant who lives in L.A., I was recommended to her by a friend years ago when Aspen was a baby, when I was just in the thick of it, losing it.
And I swear she, you guys, is an actual baby whisperer.
And I was so intimidated by the topic of sleep training as a first-time mom with Aspen.
And I did so much research and I feel like there's such a negative connotation with the words sleep training because everyone just assumes it means like the cried out method where you just plop the baby in the crib, close the door, and literally just leave your baby to scream and cry until they just pass out from exhaustion.
And after doing research and talking with Ileana, our sleep consultant, there is so much more to sleep training than that.
And that is just one way.
And if that's what you do, incredible.
That's absolutely not what I did with any of my kids.
I don't know about you guys, but like when I hear my babies cry, it like I have like blood rushing through my body like so fast.
I get so hot and flustered.
It I'm pretty sure I like read something and I think I might have talked about this before, but like how like in a woman's body, we actually have this fight or flight mode that activates when our babies cry that men don't have.
And that's why like if one of my babies is crying, I'm like, I cannot focus on anything else until I fix this.
Where Scotty's like, oh, I can let the baby cry.
Like he doesn't even notice when the baby's crying.
And so I think that's just like the distinct difference between men and women.
And like it's part of our like innate being as well.
to have this fight or flight activated when we hear our babies cry.
So anyways, my point to this is that sleep training is not just the cried out method for anyone who hears that term and is like, oh my gosh, I could absolutely never do that.
Every time we've done it, it's been so much more of a gentle and supportive experience.
I want to say the way that we do it, it's like a blend between the Ferber method, which is kind of going in, putting the baby down, and going in in various intervals to check on the baby, help soothe the baby, where you start at three minutes, and then you go to five minutes, and then you go to eight minutes, and you work your way up as the baby starts getting used to it.
It's a pick up put down method where when the baby is crying you pick them up and you hold them to soothe them and when they stop crying you put them back down again and it's just like that repeated motion over and over and over again so Ileana kind of blends the two of those and every time I've done this you guys like will let the baby cry for a few minutes she's like okay there's the timer it's up and I'm like oh my gosh that wasn't that bad like I thought it was going to be 10 times worse and So it's a process that I've gotten really comfortable with where I feel like we are pushing our baby to experience new things and to grow.
But it's not something that's traumatizing our children or them or leaving them feel abandoned.
And I do want to say from like the top of this episode that I completely understand if sleep training is not for you.
I feel like it's not for everyone.
So just as we did with Aspen and Bash, we used Ileana.
She is the most incredible sleep consultant who lives in L.A., I was recommended to her by a friend years ago when Aspen was a baby, when I was just in the thick of it, losing it.
And I swear she, you guys, is an actual baby whisperer.
And I was so intimidated by the topic of sleep training as a first-time mom with Aspen.
And I did so much research and I feel like there's such a negative connotation with the words sleep training because everyone just assumes it means like the cried out method where you just plop the baby in the crib, close the door, and literally just leave your baby to scream and cry until they just pass out from exhaustion.
And after doing research and talking with Ileana, our sleep consultant, there is so much more to sleep training than that.
And that is just one way.
And if that's what you do, incredible.
That's absolutely not what I did with any of my kids.
I don't know about you guys, but like when I hear my babies cry, it like I have like blood rushing through my body like so fast.
I get so hot and flustered.
It I'm pretty sure I like read something and I think I might have talked about this before, but like how like in a woman's body, we actually have this fight or flight mode that activates when our babies cry that men don't have.
And that's why like if one of my babies is crying, I'm like, I cannot focus on anything else until I fix this.
Where Scotty's like, oh, I can let the baby cry.
Like he doesn't even notice when the baby's crying.
And so I think that's just like the distinct difference between men and women.
And like it's part of our like innate being as well.
to have this fight or flight activated when we hear our babies cry.
So anyways, my point to this is that sleep training is not just the cried out method for anyone who hears that term and is like, oh my gosh, I could absolutely never do that.
Every time we've done it, it's been so much more of a gentle and supportive experience.
I want to say the way that we do it, it's like a blend between the Ferber method, which is kind of going in, putting the baby down, and going in in various intervals to check on the baby, help soothe the baby, where you start at three minutes, and then you go to five minutes, and then you go to eight minutes, and you work your way up as the baby starts getting used to it.
It's a pick up put down method where when the baby is crying you pick them up and you hold them to soothe them and when they stop crying you put them back down again and it's just like that repeated motion over and over and over again so Ileana kind of blends the two of those and every time I've done this you guys like will let the baby cry for a few minutes she's like okay there's the timer it's up and I'm like oh my gosh that wasn't that bad like I thought it was going to be 10 times worse and So it's a process that I've gotten really comfortable with where I feel like we are pushing our baby to experience new things and to grow.
But it's not something that's traumatizing our children or them or leaving them feel abandoned.
And I do want to say from like the top of this episode that I completely understand if sleep training is not for you.
I feel like it's not for everyone.
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