Blood Vessels: The Watercolor Murders

So this is a really important episode for me to essentially say, OK, I have severed from my abusers.

I've severed from the expectations of my controlling, abusive, religious family.

What next? What now? And I've had a really, really difficult last week.

This is the part of the show where I recommend drug use.

Dear parents, please not freak out.

I care about your children with all my heart and soul.

I am never going to tell you I'm going to I'm going to tell anyone to use a micro dose of cannabis as an edible just like this.

So, and this is really important to me to say for the folks who are healing because I genuinely I don't know that I could have healed this much without it.

It's works as a kind of anesthesia.

It's a painkiller.

I use it in a medical sense when I'm really, really in a lot of pain from what I've opened in trauma processing.

That's very real, you open an old painful memory.

And then you have panic attacks and you're frightened and you're in a ton of actual physical pain.

I have found that a microdose of a cannabis edible, for me it has to be an edible.

Smoking did not work for me.

Do your own thing, I'm not here to judge you.

But a microdose, so 2.5 milligrams edible format, studies seem to indicate that's much, much safer.

start it with a workout.

Or if you have a friend to keep an eye on you, you can also start it in a sauna so it kind of gets more into your body.

And then you can kind of just be in a little bit of a gentle halo throughout the day.

And the better you get at communing with the magic and the electromagnetic field, the consciousness, the more that kind of...

For me, I was like, oh, I can communicate with the Holy Spirit again.

This is great.

I missed the Holy Spirit.

Oh my God, Holy Spirit, you're still there? Hi! And so just sort of praying and communing again.