VLOG POD | Saturday thoughts, grocery shopping, and getting out of the house

And a lot of us kind of shared the sentiment of like the biggest place for dissatisfaction and discontentment in my life is the home.

And it's so trippy because I spend all day in the home.

I spend all day in the home.

I mother from home and I work from home.

And I also transparently hate my home.

I can never stay on top of it.

I don't feel like I'm very good at decorating it.

And every time I try to thrift a decoration to put on the wall, I'm like, God, this looks bad.

I don't like it.

When it's clean, which feels rare, like, but let's take a room at a time.

When a room at a time is clean, like, even at its best, I'm just like, I don't feel like I like the way this looks.

And I totally recognize how, like, when I say it out loud, I'm like, yeah, that is honest, authentic, and bratty all at the same time.

You know, like...

There's so much to be grateful for, which I recognize, but I am, honestly, I get plagued by the dissatisfaction of my own house.

And what a slippery slope that is, especially in a world that whether you want to equate your identity as a mom and a home mom, maker and a caregiver and like honestly a woman like I can reject that like my home is not a reflection of who I am all day but it is just going to be far harder for me to let that message sink into my brain than it would be my husband you know what I'm saying like without having to like really spend a lot of time talking about like gender expectations in our year of the lord 2026 um It's just going to be tricky.

It's just going to be tricky.

Anyways, with that, a girl in our group was talking about how gratitude is such a good reliever of that because obviously it makes you grateful for what you have, but it also just kind of gets your mind off of myself, my house, myself, my house, myself, my house.

And it reminded me of when my son was going through a lot of surgeries and maybe half a year ago and we were spending a lot of time in a children's hospital.

And I feel like this sounds so corny and it's so dramatic, but the amount of time I spent in a children's hospital had a direct correlation to how much time I spent huffing and puffing about my house and just feeling dissatisfied with it.

It gives you a perspective.

And the ladies at our table, they offer similar experiences.

Other situations that offer perspective that maybe you wouldn't get if you just wake up, stay at your house, and do your same four things every single day.

And to me, I was like, oh my gosh, I think the most spiritual practical takeaway is I need to get out of my house more.

If I, if I can be realistic and you guys know, I can say this, like the house is, I have finite amount of willpower.

And I cannot, truly, I cannot budget any more of my willpower and discipline and emotional energy to the house.