Aug 4, 2026 · 34 min · 10 segments
Send us Fan Mail Have you ever done all the right things — stayed consistent, showed up, tried harder — and still felt like you were running in…
Anne Marie PizarroHostI blew up my habits and rituals a couple of years ago because I hit a wall and had a midlife identity crisis.
Who was I in this season of life? What was important to me? Why did it even matter? See, I've been operating with habits and rituals that were highly functional in my 20s, 30s, and 40s.
They shaped me into the kind of person who was highly productive, had multiple plates spinning at the same time, and could run at 200 miles per hour on a daily basis.
Then I entered the colorful, chaotic mess called perimenopause, and I realized that I had changed.
But it also fostered a sense of feeling lost, unsure, confused, stuck, and untethered.
How the hell can you be all those things at once, but none of them clearly? What I understand now, through years of studying the soul, reading thousands of Akashic records, and my own evolution, is that those early habits and rituals weren't just routines.
They were a blueprint being installed, telling me something about behavior, belonging, and contribution.
Because if we don't understand where our habits are coming from, we'll spend the rest of our lives trying to break the ones we didn't even consciously choose.
Every single one of us inherited a set of behaviors from three primary places.
whether hustle was born and worn like a badge of honor, or whether ease was modeled with guilt.
You watched all of it and internalized it, and without realizing it, started performing versions of those behaviors yourself, not because you chose them, but because they were in the air you breathed.
the cultural level, habits and rituals carry the weight of the collective identity, what it means to show up, to succeed, to be a person of integrity.
Now, different cultures have wildly different answers, and those answers shaped what was rewarded and what was penalized, fitting in, contributing to the group, being accepted.
I blew up my habits and rituals a couple of years ago because I hit a wall and had a midlife identity crisis.
Who was I in this season of life? What was important to me? Why did it even matter? See, I've been operating with habits and rituals that were highly functional in my 20s, 30s, and 40s.
They shaped me into the kind of person who was highly productive, had multiple plates spinning at the same time, and could run at 200 miles per hour on a daily basis.
Then I entered the colorful, chaotic mess called perimenopause, and I realized that I had changed.
But it also fostered a sense of feeling lost, unsure, confused, stuck, and untethered.
How the hell can you be all those things at once, but none of them clearly? What I understand now, through years of studying the soul, reading thousands of Akashic records, and my own evolution, is that those early habits and rituals weren't just routines.
They were a blueprint being installed, telling me something about behavior, belonging, and contribution.
Because if we don't understand where our habits are coming from, we'll spend the rest of our lives trying to break the ones we didn't even consciously choose.
Every single one of us inherited a set of behaviors from three primary places.
whether hustle was born and worn like a badge of honor, or whether ease was modeled with guilt.
You watched all of it and internalized it, and without realizing it, started performing versions of those behaviors yourself, not because you chose them, but because they were in the air you breathed.
the cultural level, habits and rituals carry the weight of the collective identity, what it means to show up, to succeed, to be a person of integrity.
Now, different cultures have wildly different answers, and those answers shaped what was rewarded and what was penalized, fitting in, contributing to the group, being accepted.
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