427: When Life Doesn't Fit Your Business Plan

You know, the real big tension that I've had in this season is the weight of ambition in a heavy season.

You know, it's not just the logistics that are the hardest piece of it, right? The doctor's appointments, needing to do something, you know, maybe an urgent care visit or something, and you were anticipating, you know, cooking a meal instead or cooking dinner or something like that.

But it's the internal negotiation between who you've been building toward and what this season actually requires of you.

What does this actually look like for me? I love selling the couch genuinely deeply.

I love serving our field through this podcast.

I've been building the unshakable golfer on the side because I miss clinical work, but I didn't want to go back into a traditional private practice.

And so what I'm really creating is a performance-based retreat, taking my knowledge and insights in my work as a psychologist and But also now a golfer and combining my training in brain spotting and in ACT and in something called Heart Path, which is doing some pretty cool stuff.

And I... and all of that is being created and i've been training seriously for golf i have been wanting to play since i was a little kid and we finally had the opportunity to do that in part because we were able to pay off the mortgage and i've been immersed in weekly lessons uh somewhere i would say like 10 to 12 hours a week focused on golf kind of throughout the year Uh, and then another few hours, it's basically a part-time job, a few hours focused on mobility and recovery and, you know, saunas and cold plunges and all that kind of stuff.

So I, my, this, you know, 44 year old body doesn't break down, but, uh, But it's led me to realize something.

One is, you know, I had a vision of this next season of my life and work.

And then the season changed before I even got there.

And the honest wrestling I've had to sit is with some really uncomfortable questions.

First, what do I hold and what do I set down, at least for now? How do I honor my ambition without abandoning my family? How do I show up for people who need me without disappearing from myself? I don't have clean answers.

And it would be foolish of me to even record a podcast saying as much.

But I have three things that I'm coming back to.

And this is what I wanted the crux of this episode.

Again, this is not... you know, hacks or frameworks or advice.

It's just what feels true right now and what I wanted to share.

And I'm sure I will iterate and figure out things and keep, you know, keep trying to navigate and try to figure out what's going on here.