Aug 6, 2026 · 14 min · 11 segments
Do you feel like you're constantly reminding, nagging, or correcting your teenager—and somehow it always turns into a battle of wills? If you're exhausted by constant reminders, arguments, and…
Let's talk about three things you might be doing without realizing it that create power struggles with your teen.
Power struggle is you want your teenager to do something, they don't want to do it, and so they're not gonna do it, or they're resisting doing it, or they're procrastinating doing it, and so then it's kind of like, "Okay, who's gonna win this argument," right? And so then you remind, and you nag, and maybe you lecture, and then they don't wanna do it.
And then maybe you have incentives, and then maybe you have threats, and then maybe you have consequences, and they still don't wanna do the thing that you're asking.
Who, who is going to dig their heels in harder? And it creates a dynamic between parent and teen that isn't very much fun for either side in the end.
So the three things you might be doing without realizing it are ordering, directing, and correcting.
You better get your chores done." And that feels like, well, yeah, that's just what you have to do as a parent, right? If you want anything done, then you have to order, direct, and correct your kids.
This mode of communication creates a lot of frustration and exhaustion for you as a mom because you end up nagging, maybe even exploding when they don't listen.
And then what's really happening is you're handing over your emotional remote control, and it's like, "I need you to do this thing, and I'm gonna be annoyed with you unless you do it, and then I'll stop bugging you, and I'll stop being annoyed." And in this scenario, best case is that they do what you ask, but they feel kind of bossed around.
The worst case is they refuse to do what you ask, even if you nag and remind and get frustrated, even if you have consequences or punishments.
And then if you've decided that you're gonna be frustrated unless they do the thing, then you're left having to be frustrated because they're not going to do it.
Let's talk about three things you might be doing without realizing it that create power struggles with your teen.
Power struggle is you want your teenager to do something, they don't want to do it, and so they're not gonna do it, or they're resisting doing it, or they're procrastinating doing it, and so then it's kind of like, "Okay, who's gonna win this argument," right? And so then you remind, and you nag, and maybe you lecture, and then they don't wanna do it.
And then maybe you have incentives, and then maybe you have threats, and then maybe you have consequences, and they still don't wanna do the thing that you're asking.
Who, who is going to dig their heels in harder? And it creates a dynamic between parent and teen that isn't very much fun for either side in the end.
So the three things you might be doing without realizing it are ordering, directing, and correcting.
You better get your chores done." And that feels like, well, yeah, that's just what you have to do as a parent, right? If you want anything done, then you have to order, direct, and correct your kids.
This mode of communication creates a lot of frustration and exhaustion for you as a mom because you end up nagging, maybe even exploding when they don't listen.
And then what's really happening is you're handing over your emotional remote control, and it's like, "I need you to do this thing, and I'm gonna be annoyed with you unless you do it, and then I'll stop bugging you, and I'll stop being annoyed." And in this scenario, best case is that they do what you ask, but they feel kind of bossed around.
The worst case is they refuse to do what you ask, even if you nag and remind and get frustrated, even if you have consequences or punishments.
And then if you've decided that you're gonna be frustrated unless they do the thing, then you're left having to be frustrated because they're not going to do it.
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