I'M SINGLE

I am officially single.

And you know what, I can't really decide if there's bad blood or not.

I mean, I did text him, and I said, there's no bad blood.

And he responded to that, it's all bad blood.

So, you know, I guess that answers that question.

My parents were in town this weekend, which I'll tell you guys about in a second.

And I was obviously, you know, I told my parents everything.

And I feel like you guys have probably seen the meme before where it's like, my parents don't ask me to, you know, Make sure, like, oh, is your boyfriend being nice to you? I'm worried he's not going to treat you right.

It's the opposite.

You know, they worry that I'm treating him not right and being a bitch.

Which, you know, is valid.

You know, the shoe fits.

And I went to brunch with them one of the days.

And...

They were like, so how'd you do it? And so I read them like one of the texts and they all their jaws were on the floor.

They were like, that's not easy.

That's not being nice.

OK, you know what? You can't ask certain people.

It's like asking a lion to act like a giraffe.

You know, like you can't shapeshift that hard.

And also my dad was saying, you have to let them down easy.

You have to say it's you, not me.

But it's not me.

It's never me.

So why would I do that? You know, like we have to be honest here.