The Hidden Risks of Online Challenges and Social Media Trends – Ep. 89

So I was thinking, Elizabeth, about starting our conversation today, and I was tempted to start at the obvious place, which is of course the tween and the teen years.

But I feel like the bond and the relationships with our kids that empower them to say no to a number of dangerous things start much sooner than that.

You're both a doctor and a mom, Elizabeth.

Tell me for a moment about what you believe to be the key things in the early parenting years that can help set us up for success.

Oh, that simple question? Okay, no problem.

Right.

[laughs]

I can handle it.

[laughs] Um, I, my, so my kids are 16 and nine, so I have a big gap between them, and I have a nine-year-old who thinks she's a 16-year-old and a 16-year-old who was 30 at birth.

So totally different-

Love it

... personalities from each other, and they are both thriving in their own ways.

But I think, you know, we have to remember as parents, first and foremost, no matter what the topic, where we struggle is when expectations don't meet reality.

And, you know, that is always so hard.

And so you can read every single book there is, and without fail your kid will have read a different parenting book, right? I kind of jokingly say that.

And so consistency with how we do things is so important, and understanding now that in addition to learning how to take care of themselves and brush their own teeth and read and all of the other things, we need to teach our children to be safe, good, healthy digital citizens.

And so, you know, that really runs the gamut, but w- we know we have to exist in a world with social media, online stuff, using online platforms to gain information.

How do we do that appropriately? How do we do that safely? Schoolwork is gonna happen online too, and that's okay, but we have to make sure everybody can navigate all of that world.

And it starts very, very early, and it starts hopefully, you know, at the kitchen table with a parent right next to the child on that tablet playing a game, seeing what it is.

"Oh, there's a pop-up ad.

What do we do with that? Why is that there? What are they trying to show us with that? Why do you feel so strongly that you wanna click on this button a million times to get more coins?" All of those types of things start very early, instead of just, "Hey, you're 16 now.

Good luck out there." We can't do that.

We gotta start, as you said, start from the beginning.

And, you know, it crosses over to other things too, and I think that right now especially, talking about online stuff is a great way for parents to kind of use it as an excuse to have those conversations and build that trust, because right now, you know, social media and things online are kind of demonized.

And so you can easily as a parent say, "Not me telling you this.

So I was thinking, Elizabeth, about starting our conversation today, and I was tempted to start at the obvious place, which is of course the tween and the teen years.

But I feel like the bond and the relationships with our kids that empower them to say no to a number of dangerous things start much sooner than that.

You're both a doctor and a mom, Elizabeth.

Tell me for a moment about what you believe to be the key things in the early parenting years that can help set us up for success.

Oh, that simple question? Okay, no problem.

Right.

[laughs]

I can handle it.

[laughs] Um, I, my, so my kids are 16 and nine, so I have a big gap between them, and I have a nine-year-old who thinks she's a 16-year-old and a 16-year-old who was 30 at birth.

So totally different-

Love it

... personalities from each other, and they are both thriving in their own ways.

But I think, you know, we have to remember as parents, first and foremost, no matter what the topic, where we struggle is when expectations don't meet reality.

And, you know, that is always so hard.

And so you can read every single book there is, and without fail your kid will have read a different parenting book, right? I kind of jokingly say that.

And so consistency with how we do things is so important, and understanding now that in addition to learning how to take care of themselves and brush their own teeth and read and all of the other things, we need to teach our children to be safe, good, healthy digital citizens.

And so, you know, that really runs the gamut, but w- we know we have to exist in a world with social media, online stuff, using online platforms to gain information.

How do we do that appropriately? How do we do that safely? Schoolwork is gonna happen online too, and that's okay, but we have to make sure everybody can navigate all of that world.

And it starts very, very early, and it starts hopefully, you know, at the kitchen table with a parent right next to the child on that tablet playing a game, seeing what it is.

"Oh, there's a pop-up ad.

What do we do with that? Why is that there? What are they trying to show us with that? Why do you feel so strongly that you wanna click on this button a million times to get more coins?" All of those types of things start very early, instead of just, "Hey, you're 16 now.

Good luck out there." We can't do that.

We gotta start, as you said, start from the beginning.

And, you know, it crosses over to other things too, and I think that right now especially, talking about online stuff is a great way for parents to kind of use it as an excuse to have those conversations and build that trust, because right now, you know, social media and things online are kind of demonized.

And so you can easily as a parent say, "Not me telling you this.