Sep 23, 2026 ¡ 26 min ¡ 9 segments
Why Are We Trying So Hard to Make It Fit? **Childhood Wounds, Incompatibility, Faith & Why Love Alone Doesnât Make a Relationship Work.** What if your relationship isnât failing because you havenâtâŚ
Paula LoweHost
So we're going to go there today because sometimes a relationship isn't failing because somebody hasn't tried hard enough.

And when they can't get there, what do we do? Sometimes we're trying to solve something that isn't a problem.

You can be attracted to each other, respect each other, care deeply about each other, have history together, raise beautiful children together, and still discover we don't actually want the same kind of life, same kind of relationship.

And that's difficult to accept because we've romanticized this idea that if two people really love each other, they'll make it work.

And in the beginning, we're acting as somebody different to get what we want sometimes.

So when it finally comes up that there's an incompatibility problem, The other person is upset because, one, they were fooled, and two, their needs are not going to be met.

Then the other individual becomes upset because they've realized that they had to pull the wool over somebody else's eyes to get them to come along in their relationship with them.

Different expectations around sex or different needs for affection, different communication styles, different faith.

So we're going to go there today because sometimes a relationship isn't failing because somebody hasn't tried hard enough.

And when they can't get there, what do we do? Sometimes we're trying to solve something that isn't a problem.

You can be attracted to each other, respect each other, care deeply about each other, have history together, raise beautiful children together, and still discover we don't actually want the same kind of life, same kind of relationship.

And that's difficult to accept because we've romanticized this idea that if two people really love each other, they'll make it work.

And in the beginning, we're acting as somebody different to get what we want sometimes.

So when it finally comes up that there's an incompatibility problem, The other person is upset because, one, they were fooled, and two, their needs are not going to be met.

Then the other individual becomes upset because they've realized that they had to pull the wool over somebody else's eyes to get them to come along in their relationship with them.

Different expectations around sex or different needs for affection, different communication styles, different faith.
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