Aug 24, 2026 · 1 hr 13 min · 14 segments
In this episode of Flip That Switch, i chatted Nicole, a domestic violence survivor who shares her powerful journey from an unhealthy relationship to healing, empowerment, and finding her voice…
And we're going to get into the parenting here in a second.
But the last thing I want to talk about is there are a lot of people who go through this similar situation, like domestic violence and abuse.
And they feel like they had a part to play in this or this was something that it was really their fault.
Did you ever at any time...
And I'm not saying it was because there's no, I don't condone any abuse or anybody hitting anybody.
My question to you is that at any time, did you feel like this was my fault or I had a part to play in this at any moment?
Yeah.
So I think the mindset shifts.
It's kind of shifts as you progress through the relationship and then get out of the relationship and heal from the relationship.
But I can remember times where we would be arguing or there would be like a physical altercation and I'd end up apologizing
to him.
Now I'm sitting here like literally begging for peace, begging for forgiveness, all because now I'm thinking, again, I caused this, right? So something I said, something I didn't do, something I may have done, something, you know, I caused this physical abuse, this physical violent act on myself.
I caused it.
So yeah.
I also can remember a time where I was in that effort mode, right? Because you get angry after a while.
You go through the stages.
And now I remember where it was like, everything is his fault.
Everything.
Nothing is on me.
I was, even if I wasn't perfect, I was young.
You played that card on me.
You know what I mean? Like now I have no accountability.
There's no, you go through the stages.
Then you heal and it's like, you kind of realize like, That violence, that abuse, those tendencies, that's him.
That's his road.
And we're going to get into the parenting here in a second.
But the last thing I want to talk about is there are a lot of people who go through this similar situation, like domestic violence and abuse.
And they feel like they had a part to play in this or this was something that it was really their fault.
Did you ever at any time...
And I'm not saying it was because there's no, I don't condone any abuse or anybody hitting anybody.
My question to you is that at any time, did you feel like this was my fault or I had a part to play in this at any moment?
Yeah.
So I think the mindset shifts.
It's kind of shifts as you progress through the relationship and then get out of the relationship and heal from the relationship.
But I can remember times where we would be arguing or there would be like a physical altercation and I'd end up apologizing
to him.
Now I'm sitting here like literally begging for peace, begging for forgiveness, all because now I'm thinking, again, I caused this, right? So something I said, something I didn't do, something I may have done, something, you know, I caused this physical abuse, this physical violent act on myself.
I caused it.
So yeah.
I also can remember a time where I was in that effort mode, right? Because you get angry after a while.
You go through the stages.
And now I remember where it was like, everything is his fault.
Everything.
Nothing is on me.
I was, even if I wasn't perfect, I was young.
You played that card on me.
You know what I mean? Like now I have no accountability.
There's no, you go through the stages.
Then you heal and it's like, you kind of realize like, That violence, that abuse, those tendencies, that's him.
That's his road.
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