554-Jesus Was Kind, but He Didn't Care. Until...

**Jesus Was Kind, but He Didn't Care. Until...** Ben planned a date night by the pool. Charcuterie board, music, the whole thing. And that night his wife told him: "If you don't change, I'm leaving." Married 24 years. Four kids. A business owner who casts limestone mantles and is in his shop by 5:15 every morning. A man's man. On one of his first calls he told me, (amongst explitives) "I've never even apologized in my life... I don't know how to do this." But Ben looked around and believed, his kids are worth it. His family's worth it. God is worth it. This week he's on the podcast, and he said something I hope husbands stop and think about: "She just wants me to be kind, and I'm like, 'You know what? For me to be kind, I have to care.' And for most of my life, I didn't care... And that's not a loving Savior." Ben's view of God shifted from a harsh God who is just there to discipline and not much else, to Jesus, who is kind. And then his marriage started to change. Christian marriage transformation became real for Ben when his wife told him something had to change. In this episode you'll hear: How a hard childhood taught him to shut down and walk away Why he finally understood what she meant by "You don't make me feel safe" and how that blocked everything Why he went through the program twice, and what finally broke through His blunt advice for the man who's where he was Today? They're 180 degree different and they're completely different, because of his transformation. Husband, you're the leader. When you change, everything in your marriage and family changes. If you're thinking, "Belah, I don't need the episode. I need the coaching," we'd love to help. delightyourmarriage.com/cc At DYM we coach husbands and wives to transform their marriage even if only one does the work, but we encourage the husbands to go first. Blessings, Belah PS - Want more insight into the health of your marriage? Take our free Marital Health Assessment to find out your Marital Health score. PPS - Ready to start your healing journey? Schedule a free Clarity Call and see if our programs are the right fit for you. PPPS - Here is what (another) recent Coaching Graduate had to say: \[before coaching], *"I felt like I was living a lie, didn't like my husband yet I didn't really believe in divorce and didn't want the consequences of how that would affect our family. I suffer from abandonment issues and felt like I was abandoned especially in my marriage. I had Extreme Loneliness, felt unfulfilled, disappointment, resentment, always questioning God "why would you choose this for me" , "why cant you just fix this."* \[after coaching], *"I never saw myself as a controlling nag, I just saw myself with the unlucky draw of a husband who thought only of himself. Now I feel like I won the lottery."*