157. WHY "YOU'RE DOING SO WELL" NEVER REALLY HELPS

There is a pattern that I see it so often.

It's that idea that you feel a bit stuck on something in your business.

So you do the really sensible thing and you ask someone, you ask somebody a question.

It may be a really good friend or a peer or someone that you really admire.

And the question that you ask is usually something like, what do you think? Does this look okay? Do you think I'm on the right track? And almost every single time the answer you get back is warm and it's kind, but it's also so often completely useless.

Something along the lines of, oh, it's lovely, you're doing so well, and just keep going.

And because you get that sort of relatively vanilla, quite general answer, You come away feeling briefly reassured that you're on the right track, you're doing the right thing, but actually you're none the wiser.

And the thing is that none of that is their fault, the person that you're asking.

It's the fault of the question, because a really vague question can only ever get a really vague answer.

When you ask someone, what do you think of my business? you're giving them nothing really to hold onto or to understand.

So they look for the kindest and maybe the safest and kind of the most general thing that they can say, which often is a form of encouragement.

And all of this is very lovely, but it doesn't really help or move you very much.

But a very specific question is a completely different thing.

A specific question gets you real useful help.

And it's something that I help people with the whole time inside The Bright Line.

So often questions that are asked are not the real questions that need to be asked.

And in there, it's straightforward because I am very fortunate.

I've had the most incredible sort of inside experience.

I've got to understand the inside of creative founders' heads.

And I have seen it again and again.

When somebody asks a particular question, I understand what the question needs to be I can see what's happening underneath and because of that I can then give them a really really detailed thorough reply that will absolutely move them forward in their business but so often if you're asking somebody that doesn't have that experience you get something that is very very general but there is a way that you can improve it and And there's a way that you can absolutely ask far better questions and get really useful answers in reply.

So, for example, if I give you a series of different examples and some of these might apply to you right now.

And if so, then that's great.

You can then go ahead and use them.

So, for example, a classic one would be, what do you think of my website? So instead of saying that, because that's a really vague, big question.

There is a pattern that I see it so often.

It's that idea that you feel a bit stuck on something in your business.

So you do the really sensible thing and you ask someone, you ask somebody a question.

It may be a really good friend or a peer or someone that you really admire.

And the question that you ask is usually something like, what do you think? Does this look okay? Do you think I'm on the right track? And almost every single time the answer you get back is warm and it's kind, but it's also so often completely useless.

Something along the lines of, oh, it's lovely, you're doing so well, and just keep going.

And because you get that sort of relatively vanilla, quite general answer, You come away feeling briefly reassured that you're on the right track, you're doing the right thing, but actually you're none the wiser.

And the thing is that none of that is their fault, the person that you're asking.

It's the fault of the question, because a really vague question can only ever get a really vague answer.

When you ask someone, what do you think of my business? you're giving them nothing really to hold onto or to understand.

So they look for the kindest and maybe the safest and kind of the most general thing that they can say, which often is a form of encouragement.

And all of this is very lovely, but it doesn't really help or move you very much.

But a very specific question is a completely different thing.

A specific question gets you real useful help.

And it's something that I help people with the whole time inside The Bright Line.

So often questions that are asked are not the real questions that need to be asked.

And in there, it's straightforward because I am very fortunate.

I've had the most incredible sort of inside experience.

I've got to understand the inside of creative founders' heads.

And I have seen it again and again.

When somebody asks a particular question, I understand what the question needs to be I can see what's happening underneath and because of that I can then give them a really really detailed thorough reply that will absolutely move them forward in their business but so often if you're asking somebody that doesn't have that experience you get something that is very very general but there is a way that you can improve it and And there's a way that you can absolutely ask far better questions and get really useful answers in reply.

So, for example, if I give you a series of different examples and some of these might apply to you right now.

And if so, then that's great.

You can then go ahead and use them.

So, for example, a classic one would be, what do you think of my website? So instead of saying that, because that's a really vague, big question.