The Case For Space: Why "holding each other tighter" doesn't work for a lot of people

A key principle of relationship is intimacy is good. Turn towards each other. Hold each other tight. Those are good things in and of themselves. The good element of the concept is that it rescues dependency from shame. It's not immature to want to be close to someone else and to help you deal with life. But the idea that "the couple" is the only site where feelings should. Some people want privacy, space, and the opportunity to reflect by themselves. Too often those behaviours are pathologised. This isn't just about "negative" or difficult emotions, either. Positive emotions - joy, excitement etc. - are just as valuably experienced outside of the relationship, too. Matt and Graham have a go at making the case for sometimes turning inwards. And sometimes turning out to other people - friends, family, kids - is just as healthy as leaning on your romantic partner. You can work with Graham here: www.grahamjohnston.uk You can work with Matt here: www.matwotton.com Leave us a review if you like what we're doing with the pod. It really helps other people find it and enjoy it.