Faithfulness Over Fixing in Caregiving

That is not where most of us start.

Most of us begin caregiving with questions, energy, a desire to help.

We call the doctor, we research the diagnosis, we learn about the medications, the therapies, the routines, safety tools, and resources.

We talk with family, we gather information, we make plans, and we do everything that we know to do to make life better for the person that we love.

And many times those things matter.

The right resource, it can bring relief.

The right support can reduce stress.

And the right doctor with medication adjustments or change in routine, it can really make a real difference.

And I don't want to minimize that because wise action is part of faithful caregiving.

But there's also a season when no matter how much we love someone, no matter how hard we work, we come face to face with something we cannot change.

The diagnosis remains.

The decline continues.

The body does not respond the way that we hoped.

The mind doesn't come back the way that we longed for.

The family situation doesn't suddenly become simple.

And the prayer that we prayed over and over and over again does not unfold the way we imagined.

And when that happens, it can shake us.

Caregivers are often problem solvers by necessity.

We notice what needs to be done and we do it.

We become advocates and organizers, researchers, schedulers, medication managers, and sometimes even the emotional anchor for the whole family.

So when we run into a situation that cannot be fixed, it can feel disorienting.

It can even feel like a failure.

But I don't believe it is failure.

I believe it is one of the places where God begins to teach us the difference between fixing and faithfulness.