And, and, and the mental strength and stamina, where does that come from? How do you, how have you fine tuned that muscle?

Yeah.

I mean, it just goes back to like, it's just like, it's like, like you said, it's like a muscle.

You're like, you're working at it.

Every time you get on a trail or every time you have an anxious moment, you just, you're working at it.

And it's, you can't wake up one day and decide I'm going to be mentally strong.

I'm going to know how to suffer well, if you will, or I'm not going to have anxiety.

How much of that is the intentionality around that exposure? How much of it is like working with Megan and working with other experts to kind of unpack what led you to have that challenge in North Carolina versus, you know, now you can go on the hard rock course and look forward to nighttime?

[laughs]

So, so yeah.

It's like, you know, I'm challenging myself, but I also want to do extremely well.

Like, I wanna challenge myself to be first or on the podium.

Um, so I would say it's like both of those.

I think right now in running, I think, I think Western States this year, I, I think I left a lot of time out there.

I think I left, um, some things out there I want to change, you know.

... doing the big loop?

Like, is there somebody that's a part of the Hardrock community that you feel like has been influential in your journey there in the San Juans?

That's a great question.

Um, I think, like, this race is really special.

Uh, there's a couple races that are like this in the US, but, uh, this race is really special in that it keeps, it holds onto a really deep community, um, a community of, like, people who've done it from, like, year one and people who have done it in years previous.

Like, it's got a really deep community.

Um, and there's just so many, there's so many people that you can pick from.

Um, so many iconic women that, you know, had the course record for a long time.

[chuckles]

Like, is there somebody that's a part of the Hardrock community that you feel like has been influential in your journey there in the San Juans?

That's a great question.

Um, I think, like, this race is really special.

Uh, there's a couple races that are like this in the US, but, uh, this race is really special in that it keeps, it holds onto a really deep community.

Um, a community of, like, people who've done it from, like, year one and people who have done it in years previous.

Like, it's got a really deep community.

Um, and there's just so many, there's so many people that you can pick from.

[chuckles]

Can you talk about how or whether that inability to appreciate such a great result serves you well in this sport or it works against you?

Oh, that's-- You always have the best questions.

[chuckles] Um, they really get me thinking.

Um, I think it could be possibly both.

Um, kind of never satisfied with anything.

Like, that, the, it was very much that feeling after Black Canyon too, just feeling like, you know, I feel like there was more there, and I just like, I worked really hard, but there's still, like, I'm not satisfied.

Same thing with Gorge.

Mm

Have you ever contemplated sort of, like, where that ferociousness comes from?

Yeah.

[clears throat] I say this all the time.

There's, there's a lot that goes into it.

I think, like, growing up, like, in sports, um, I just felt like I was never good enough.

Um, just, like, r- just from what people, what my, uh, a couple coaches had said when I was playing competitive soccer, um, and, like, you know, family stuff.

You just grow up and you think you're, like, never good enough.

Under those, under those circumstances, like, if you're tuning into how you truly feel in this moment, is there any way to communicate that?

... to other people that have had heart attacks before.

Oh, my gosh.

I, I think, I think I'm also a very expressive person, too, like facially expressive, um, at times, especially with e- high efforts.

Um, yeah, I would s- I would definitely...

Going back to the first question, I would definitely say the, the, the effort during the race is a lot harder than the effort of coming up with something to do at the finish line, for sure.

There have been times that I've thought about and, like, when I have crossed the finish line, how will I celebrate? And I wasn't thinking of that for Javelina.

I had something that I wanted to do because I was dressed as a cat, and I was like, I had it planned.

Because it was just such a fucking boring course?

I don't know.

As somebody who kind of goes through that, like, rigor, you know, going through, like, Black Canyon or going through Javelina, and constantly people are like, Tara's there, but we also have these people.

And, like, not saying that happens every time, but it really makes you want to prove them wrong.

And as somebody who has been on the top of that prediction list, it puts a lot of...

I know Courtney and Rachel...

they actually don't really care about any of that stuff.

They're pretty easygoing.

And how does that? How does that impact you to Tara, you've done a lot of these races where there's cameras, right and things is it is it distracting?

... you know, you just smashed Black Canyon also.

Yeah.

I mean, kind of my thought was, like, I, I have the quote, um, "Be like water" by Bruce Lee in my, in my mind.

And, you know, it was very fitting for this course with the waterfalls, and I just wanted to, like, put myself out there.

And not, I didn't wanna put myself in a box.

Like, I, I'm a big proponent for not putting myself in a box or anyone in a box.

Like, we don't know what we can do if we don't try.

[laughs]

Oh, give us an example

...

it, I'm lucky.

Um, there was, like, a hunter with a huge, huge, ginormous gun, and he was, like, asking me where I was going and what I was doing, and I was like, "Oh, crap," like, "Is this real?" [laughs] And it was in the middle of the night.

It was at 2:00 AM on a trail by myself.

[laughs] Do you eat while you run?

Yes.

Yeah.